Lux Radio Theatre - Mr Belvedere Goes to College
Lux Radio Theatre - Mr Belvedere Goes to College
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Speaker 1: Lucks Resent Hollywood.
Speaker 2: Leaver Brothers Company, the makers of Luck Toiletself bring you
the Lux Radio Theater, darring Clifton Webb, Colleen.
Speaker 3: Gray and Robert Sack.
Speaker 1: In Mister Belvidere Goes to College, Ladies and Gentlemen, Your producer,
mister William Peeling.
Speaker 4: Greetings from Hollywood, Ladies and Gentlemen. On rare occasions, a
character in a picture or play will become so identified
with one star that the audience simply can't imagine anyone
else in the park. Now that's the way it is
with mister Belvidere and Clifton Webb. It all began in
a delightful comedy called Sitting Pretty, and the public admired
mister Belvidere and Clifton Webb to such a fabulous extent
that a sequel was immediately demanded. Twenty a century Fox
came through a few months ago.
Speaker 5: With a second hit, Mister Belvidere Goes to College.
Speaker 4: You'll hear it to Night with Clifton Webb as the
versatil and ubiquitous Lynne Belvidere, and starring with mister Webb
are Robert Stack and Colleen Gray. Colleen Gray as a
co ed is quite typical of the standard of beauty
among American college girls. You know, there's one thing these
girls seem to learn long before they go to college,
and that's the best.
Speaker 5: Way to take care of a beautiful complexion.
Speaker 4: Like the screen stars, the smart co eds depend on
Luck's toilet soap care. Once again, you meet the famous
mister Belvidere as the curtain rises on the first act
of tonight's play, starring Clifton Webb in the title role,
Colleen Gray as Ellen, and Robert Stack as Bill. On
a bright autumn morning, a visitor pauses at the gates
of Clement's University. Then, with an air of mixed boredom
and determination, he starts across the campus.
Speaker 6: And they just announced it avery the tickets for the
Warbash game. They're on sale. Now, Oh, what's where you
go with Julia? But right into the statue, say who
is the statue?
Speaker 1: Anyway?
Speaker 7: Who is it?
Speaker 6: That's mister lux Lux who mister lux Lucks. Can't you be?
But it says there looks Bettes's Luck's orbis.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but what's it mean, sir?
Speaker 7: To be?
Speaker 6: Maybe he's the guy who had vetted the soap they
advertised the radio.
Speaker 3: Luke's Mentors Luke's orbis huh oh. The light of the
mind is the light of the world.
Speaker 6: Well, I'll be a Bucky's uncle.
Speaker 3: The point is well taken. Can either of you adolescents
direct me to the office of the dean huh oh.
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, straight ahead to the library and two blocks right,
thank you? Or who's that guy? Do prop? I guess
come by Jill it gonna.
Speaker 7: Take it in.
Speaker 3: Well, well, so you are Lynn Belvidere, and that is correct,
Dean Gibbs. I can't tell you how happy my wife
would be to learn that I've met you. She read
your book, you know, said it was a work of art.
Speaker 1: Yes it is.
Speaker 3: Now, just what can I do for you, mister Belvidere.
You may register me in this university, but what on
earth for ten thousand dollars? I don't follow, doctor Gibbs.
My novel Hummingbird Hill has just won the moor House Award,
consisting of a gold medal and ten thousand dollars in cash. Here,
surely the money doesn't mean anything to you. Money is
the root of all evil. I respect it. The less
I have of it, the more I respect it. And
at the moment I have the greatest respect for it.
But you must have made a fortune on your book.
I also lost a fortune in libel suits. I am,
in legal terms, a pauper. But what has all this
to do with postgraduate work? Here at Clemmons? Not postgraduate work?
I wish to register as a freshman. A freshman, what,
mister Belvidere. Unfortunately, the moor House Award stipulates that the
recipient hold a college degree, and you don't. My formal
education was limited to two revolting weeks in kindergarten. For
you're not serious, I am grim, but good heavens man
who taught you? The most exacting person I've ever met myself?
Pull this is simply phenomenal. Yes it is. And you
want to spend the next four years here so that
you may claim this literary prize? One year a beg
pardon a one year, But that's impossible. You're six weeks
late already, and you expect to complete a four year
course in one year. I intend, doctor Gibbs, not expect.
But it's never been done before. I've never been here before,
mister Belvidere. If you don't mind, I suggest we call
on President Keating immediately. Very special case, mister Belvidere, or
a very special case. It certainly is, President Keaton. I
am going to make an exception. That is as it
should be. We talked to Keating. He doesn't even hold
a high school diploma.
Speaker 8: Therefore, Dean Gibbs, you will arrange entrance examinations as soon
as mister Belvidere is prepared for them.
Speaker 3: Would February be too soon? February? By February, I should
be entering my sophomore year. Your what, Dean Gibbs, I
should be grateful if your staff examines me at the
earliest possible moments. Shall we say this afternoon? This afternoon,
you heard.
Speaker 8: Mdan Gibbs, this afternoon. These grades, mister Belvidere, astonishing, simply astonishing.
Speaker 1: Yes, aren't they?
Speaker 3: And his IQ, President Keating, the highest I've ever seen. Naturally,
I am a genius, and that very fact compels me
to suspect your motive, mister Belvidere, and joining us here.
Speaker 8: Belvidere, this attempt of yours to complete four years schooling
in less than one well, it could disguise an ulterior motive.
You know, a subterfuge is a strategy employed by idlers
and parasites.
Speaker 3: I have never been either.
Speaker 8: Then you won't object if we stipulate a condition, which
is that if you should attempt to use this university
for a publicity stunt to exploit your novel or yourself,
if there is any notoriety or sensationalism during your stay here,
it shall become my unpleasant duty.
Speaker 6: To expel you.
Speaker 8: Condition accepted, then allow me to welcome you officially to
Clemon's University.
Speaker 3: Thank you, President Keating.
Speaker 9: Wow, but Avery, I'm not kidding. He's there in our
room now, an old guy.
Speaker 5: She was.
Speaker 6: I thought maybe he was your father or something, come
to visit you. But what old guy? Who is he?
I don't know. I was kind of scared to ask him.
Speaker 10: He gives you such a funny look.
Speaker 6: Well we'll see about that right now. Hey, what's going
on here?
Speaker 3: It's quite obvious, young man. I have been assigned to
this dormitory and I am unpacking my clothing.
Speaker 6: Yeah, we'll shut that window.
Speaker 3: I'm merely ventilating my eight hundred and forty cubic feet.
Speaker 6: You what you see, Avery? I told you you shut.
Speaker 3: Up, young man. This room contains two thousand, five hundred
and twenty cubic feet. Since there are three beds in
the room, each of us is entitled to breathe eight
hundred and forty cubic feet of air and no more
fresh air.
Speaker 6: Gee whiz, can't you see I got a cold in
my head?
Speaker 3: A physiological impossibility, young man. Disease cannot exist in a vacuum.
Speaker 7: Shut up.
Speaker 6: I saw you yesterday and the campus did die by
mister lux lux.
Speaker 3: Now, who are you a gentleman? An exceedingly unkind? Fate
has thrown us together?
Speaker 6: You mean you're gonna be our room mate?
Speaker 1: Regrettably?
Speaker 3: Yes, you're a student, That is correct, my nasal neophyte.
Speaker 6: What class?
Speaker 1: I am a freshman?
Speaker 6: Oh? A freshman? Well you don't say I'm a freshman too?
But avery here he's a sophomore. What's your name?
Speaker 3: Lynn Belvidere? You will invest me as mister Belvidere.
Speaker 6: Now listen here, you're in college and you're a freshman,
the lowest form of adible life. And while you're here,
you're right under this thub. What do you got to
say about that?
Speaker 3: It needs a manicure?
Speaker 6: The code of the campus.
Speaker 3: Understand does the code of the campus permit me to
make a suggestion?
Speaker 6: Shoot?
Speaker 1: Blow your nose?
Speaker 6: Now, listen to you. My dame is Avery brew Baker,
and you refer to me all types as mister brew Baker.
Speaker 9: See, my name's Cornelius Whitaker, mister Belvidere. But on account
of I'm a freshman too, you can call me corny.
Speaker 6: Shut up, and you'll do everything I say? Or gets
pig for the sophomore council?
Speaker 3: Am I who understand that this university supports an inquisition?
Speaker 7: Boy?
Speaker 6: Does it? I can show you the scars. Where's your dig?
Speaker 3: I beg your pardon?
Speaker 6: Means this, mister Belvidere, This little cap we gotta wear.
See it's a dink. You get that out of the
co op. Belvedere, buy yourself a dick. You wear it
at all times? See and if you.
Speaker 3: Don't, boy, you mean I am compelled to wear this
obscene article.
Speaker 6: Oh you get used to him. After a while, you
and Whittaker will share a cleaning up this joint, making
my bed for me and calling me for classes. And
he questions, Belvidere, Hey, where do you think you're going?
Speaker 3: I'm going to the library.
Speaker 6: Oh no, you're not. You're going to the co op
and buy yourself a dick. And when you've bought yourself
a dick, and put the dick on your head dead,
mister the baby. You go to the library. You got me.
Speaker 3: I've got you, mister b Baker, and the possession revolts me.
Good day. Hello, Yes, young lady, pardon.
Speaker 10: Me, but by any chance are you Lynn Belvedere, the
author of Hummingbird Hill.
Speaker 3: I am the author of Hummingbird Hill, but not by chance.
Speaker 10: I've been looking everywhere for you. I heard you were
registered and I just had to see.
Speaker 3: I'm our young lady. I do not give autographs.
Speaker 10: Oh I don't want an autograph. I'm Ellen Baker and
I'm on the Daily Lion. That's a college newspaper, and
I want to interview you about what, well, what you
think of college, and how it feels to be a
freshman at your age, and well just about everything.
Speaker 1: Miss Baker.
Speaker 3: Since my arrival here, certain circumstances make it impossible for
me to grant any interviews.
Speaker 10: It is vitally important to me. Why an interview with
a celebrity like you might give me my start as
a writer.
Speaker 3: I admire your ambition, miss Baker, But my answer is
irrevocably no. Now, would you be so kind as to
tell me where the student Employment Bureau is located?
Speaker 10: Well, it's right across the street from the co op.
Speaker 1: But if you're a thank you, miss Baker.
Speaker 11: Yes, this is a student employment bureau, all right. But
since the two of you came in Prizy together, well,
ladies first, Hi.
Speaker 6: Ellen, Hello Bill?
Speaker 3: Why ladies first?
Speaker 11: This common courtesy, the usual thing for your information, young man,
woman has never been first in the entire tragic history.
Speaker 3: The human race.
Speaker 7: Huh.
Speaker 3: It was not Adam who sprang from Eve's rib, Nor
did missus Noah captain the ark. Neither can the distaff
side Clay, mister Einstein, nor mister Tchaikowsky, nor mister Lincoln.
Speaker 10: What about Madame Curie?
Speaker 3: Messieur Curie's story has never been told? Therefore, Miss Baker,
you will kindly step aside.
Speaker 1: Okay, mister, what can I do for you?
Speaker 3: I am seeking part time employment during the college year.
Speaker 1: What's your name, Lynn Belvidere?
Speaker 3: And now exactly why do you need employment in order
that I won't starve to death?
Speaker 1: Well that's a pretty good reason. What can you do?
Speaker 3: Everything?
Speaker 11: Well, most of the better jobs are all filled by
now let's see, now there's an opening for a soda jerk,
there still is. Would you would you like to be
a babysitter?
Speaker 3: I've been all through that.
Speaker 11: I'm afraid that's all there is, mister Belvidere, except assistant
Hash at the try Gam House. But I wouldn't recommend
that to my worst enemy me. What is a Trigam house.
Speaker 10: That's a sorority, the Gamma Gamma Gamma sorority.
Speaker 11: Girls, mister Belvidere, lots of them. They've got the best
Norwegian cook in the world. But outside of that, oh, brother.
Speaker 3: And what are the functions of an assistant Tasha waiting
on table helping clean up the place?
Speaker 11: You get three meals a day and fifty bucks a month. Say,
my mother's a house mother there. So if you want
the job, it's yours. I accept the position. I'm warning you,
this is the slap happiest bunch of dames on the
whole campus.
Speaker 3: In that case, there will be some changes made, okay, hey,
or just.
Speaker 11: Take this card to the Trigam house mask for my mother,
missus Chase. She'll take care of you.
Speaker 1: Thank you. What can I do for you, Ellen.
Speaker 10: Oh, nothing special. I was just showing mister Belvidere where
the employment bureau was low Keating.
Speaker 3: It's obvious, mister Chase, the miss Baker is slightly less
than delighted to see you, and he's using me for
a strategic with gall today.
Speaker 10: He's quite a character, isn't he?
Speaker 1: So are you? Why did you come here?
Speaker 10: Well because a friend of mine needs a babysitter for afternoons.
Speaker 1: Okay, what address.
Speaker 10: Forty one Burnham Street.
Speaker 1: Hey, that's where you live, isn't it.
Speaker 10: Well it's an apartment house.
Speaker 11: Ellen, Look four weeks. That's a long time to be
brushed off.
Speaker 10: I haven't been brushing you off, Bill.
Speaker 11: It's just, uh sure, I know, between classes and all
the work in the newspaper, you're just having a minute
to spare.
Speaker 1: Why do you think I put you on the staff.
Speaker 10: Because being a good editor, you know I can write.
Speaker 1: You're in your big blue eyes. Had nothing to do
with it.
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 1: What's your friend's name? The one of the.
Speaker 10: Baby missus, David Ashley.
Speaker 3: I'll tell her. We can't promise anything.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 11: People are beginning to find out that there are easier
ways of making money than having junior vivisect them.
Speaker 3: Don't you like children crazy about them?
Speaker 1: Especially with us straight jacket's on?
Speaker 12: Oh, I'll tell her, Thanks Bill, I am hot.
Speaker 10: You're waiting to see somebody.
Speaker 3: I am waiting to see a missus Chase.
Speaker 13: Well, just try to write the living room and spread out.
I'll tell you here.
Speaker 3: Thank you. No, I'm just pratt for an execution. You
have been mutilating the entire composition.
Speaker 10: Oh, I hear well, I suppose you can play better?
Speaker 3: That is correct?
Speaker 1: Allow me.
Speaker 10: Why that's beautiful?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 6: It is?
Speaker 3: I big your pardon, No, Belvedere.
Speaker 10: Now you play like Rubenstein.
Speaker 3: Rubinstein plays like me.
Speaker 13: Oh, how do you do? I'm missus Chase the house mother?
Speaker 3: How do you do? May I say that this house
with your mother ring is on the brink of chaos?
Speaker 13: Isn't it just so?
Speaker 3: Missus Chase? I am Lynn Belvidere.
Speaker 13: But of course you must be the father of one
of my girls.
Speaker 3: In that unlikely event, Madam, I think you would recall
my face. Your son sent me here. He gave me
this card.
Speaker 13: My son, you assistant hasher. But that's silly.
Speaker 3: I am in need of substance, Madam. I chose this position.
Speaker 13: Oh, you're just teasing me, mister Belvidere, you're not really
a student.
Speaker 10: You don't really.
Speaker 13: Want a hash here?
Speaker 3: If you will outline my duties?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 13: Really, well, I feel it only there to tell you
the job offers very little opportunity.
Speaker 3: With twenty undisciplined females in the house, I shall make
my own opportunity.
Speaker 13: Yes, well, if you just follow me, I'll introduce you
to Aco. Thank you, And this is mister Belvidere Martha.
He's on your sister, Tasha. Martha is our pressure, mister Belvidere,
How do you do?
Speaker 1: Miguetra talk? Martha?
Speaker 13: Man the dead day can snuck?
Speaker 3: A Norse, says I.
Speaker 13: Mer mer try, mister Belvedere, you speak Norwegian.
Speaker 3: I speak eleven tongues fluently, including the Indian sign language.
Speaker 13: Will that be nice for Martha?
Speaker 7: Higher?
Speaker 13: Oh, Afley, I'm so glad you're here. I want you
to meet you a new.
Speaker 3: Assistant assistant to him.
Speaker 6: Well, how do you do the Belville boy? So you're
gonna be my little helper?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 13: You two know each other?
Speaker 3: Unfortunately, Yes, and I regret to inform you that I have.
Speaker 13: Just resigned mister Bear.
Speaker 3: My dear Marta. I'm sorry our association was so short lived.
Given a little more time, I could have brought you
the full flower as a crook.
Speaker 13: If he quits, mister shashe quit too, Mata, No, no,
you can't, mister Belvidere. We'll get New York together. You
can't quit, either of you. If anyone is going to
quit around here.
Speaker 6: Or the whiz, missus Chase, what have I done one moment?
Speaker 1: Please?
Speaker 3: I recognize that mister Boo Baker is inviting a proposal
for compromise. Very well, mister bou Baker. During our working hours,
we shall observe an armed truce. In the event of
any aggression, I shall retain the veto power over your
Trigamma destiny agreed.
Speaker 6: Huh well, yeah, I guess so splendid.
Speaker 3: Catch me up my jacket, mister Boo Baker, and hop
to it.
Speaker 6: Huh yes.
Speaker 1: Tell me, Mata, come here?
Speaker 3: What is what is for dessert this evening?
Speaker 10: Ken pangnapp, spare.
Speaker 3: The canna and Mata, the dessert will be my contribution.
Speaker 14: You make it's food.
Speaker 3: And tonight, missus Chase, we shall die and be fee.
That is all.
Speaker 14: You may go now.
Speaker 10: Hey, look everybody, look what's coming in for dessert? What
is great?
Speaker 3: Belvidere? That plate is not for you. Miss Halking Class,
kindly be good enough to serve missus Chase.
Speaker 13: Oh but I always wait on myself.
Speaker 3: Mister Belton, you are an elder, missus Chase, therefore you
will be seated and Miss auchinclass will serve you.
Speaker 10: Oh well, hey, get a load of this dessert? Is
this job dreaming?
Speaker 3: Miss Norman? Appreciation of good preisine should be demonstrated without
benefit of dialogue or sound effects.
Speaker 10: Sorry, mister Belvedere, Well, I for one don't need lessons
and manners from.
Speaker 3: A hash Possibly not Miss Arching Class, but your appearance
Warren's comment, Oh, such as since you ask, I should
advise you to make no claims, but you cannot later
prove really, I'm referring to your eyelashes, Miss Alfenclass, obviously artificial.
Speaker 13: I have got a minute by bill.
Speaker 3: Young ladies, please please.
Speaker 1: We can only stay a minute, ma'am. I'd like to
have you meet Alan Baker. This is my mother.
Speaker 13: Oh how do you do, my dear? Well, you must
be new. I haven't seen you before, have I I
guess not.
Speaker 10: Missus chase. You see, I transferred here from Stanford for
my senior year. Oh your home is in California. We're
just outside of Burlingame, Burlingame.
Speaker 13: Oh, of course the Baker's a Burlingame. Oh I danced
once with Medbury Baker. I don't house. I was much
younger than you. See my family Medbury Baker's.
Speaker 7: Well.
Speaker 13: Well, well now you too must stay and have coffee
with you.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, mam, we've got to blow up.
Speaker 13: But you will have dinner with us Miss Baker next
week maybe.
Speaker 10: Thanks.
Speaker 13: I love to splendid. Well, good night, miss Baker.
Speaker 10: Oh what's this Medbury Baker business about?
Speaker 1: Don't find my mother.
Speaker 11: She's got bruises from jumping to conclusion?
Speaker 13: Oh girls, did you sing? Who that was? Ellen? Medbury
Baker from Burlingaale?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 13: Wonderful family, very distinguished. You know you girls have to
rush you. I'm sorry, mister Belvidere, you were about to
say something.
Speaker 3: As I too have a word for the young ladies. Now, then,
as we conclude our first meal, I wish to comment
on my observations. Miss Atkins, Miss Smith, Miss Harris, you
have dined tonight with shirt tails out hanging sloppiness is
definitely per se, even at Wellesley, Miss Willis the Johnson Twins.
You were several minutes late. Henceforth hours for meals, we'll
be rigidly enforced as follows. Breakfast seven to eight a m.
Lunch twelve to one pm, Dinner seven to eight pm.
One second late, no admittance. We shall now synchronize our watches.
Speaker 1: Are you ready?
Speaker 3: It is now precisely eight oh two check check. Thank you,
good night, young ladies.
Speaker 10: Thanks for the walk deal. It was so nice meeting
your mother.
Speaker 1: Oh why can't I come up? Come on, be nice,
invite me.
Speaker 10: I told you Bill, I have to babysit the friend
of mine.
Speaker 1: But why do I see you again?
Speaker 10: Do you want to? Very good company?
Speaker 3: One of my guidance, you'll improve Tomorrow night.
Speaker 1: Seven?
Speaker 10: Okay, Bill, tomorrow night, and just be.
Speaker 11: Sure your friend gets someone else to hold hands with
their little monster.
Speaker 10: Yes, uh yes, I'll tell me Bill good night.
Speaker 1: In a few moments. We'll bring you back too.
Speaker 5: Of mister Belvidere goes to college.
Speaker 6: And now here's our Hollywood.
Speaker 5: Reporter, Libby Collins with news about the stars.
Speaker 15: You know, Barbara Stanmark amazes me. Such a straightforward person
in real life, but what a ruthless character on the screen.
Speaker 4: It takes an actress of Barbara's caliber to play the
high tension roles she has in her new picture, Thelma Jordan.
Speaker 10: What a thriller?
Speaker 15: How Wace has just turned out for paramount, or perhaps
I should say chiller. Thelma Jordan certainly made my blood
run cold.
Speaker 4: Well that's what top notch melodrama should do, Livy, and
does when it's played by experts like Barbara and her
co star Wendell Corey.
Speaker 7: Oh.
Speaker 15: Yes, Wendell certainly gives a great performance as a courier
man ruined by a scheming woman.
Speaker 4: And Barbara in a what zest and vitality she brings
to every picture.
Speaker 1: She makes a great deal of glamour too.
Speaker 15: Yes, John, With her dark, smooth beauty, Barbara Stanwick is
glamour in person. One of her greatest charms, of course,
is her creamy complexion, a lovely lux complexion.
Speaker 2: Everyone knows that Barbara's been a lux girl for years.
Speaker 15: Yes, indeed, she's really devoted to Lux toilet soap and
for all over lux loveliness. She is delighted with a
new bath sized cake.
Speaker 2: This fine new product of Liver Brothers Company has made
a hint in Hollywood. That's because it's luxurious enough to
please Hollywood's loveliest star.
Speaker 15: That generous new cake makes a perfect beauty bath, gives
you lots of creamy lather and leaves a lovely clinging
fragrance on the skin.
Speaker 2: The luxe perfume is blended by experts. It's made of
costly ingredients brought from all parts of the world.
Speaker 15: It always reminds me of a springtime bouquet no wonder.
Speaker 2: Screen stars, lovely women everywhere are enthusiastic about the new
bath size lux toilet soape. The whole family will enjoy
this generous satin smooth cake. Get the bath size lux
toilet soape tomorrow. Remember this is the fragrant white soap.
Nine out of ten screen stars recommend now our producer
mister William Keeping Act.
Speaker 4: Two of Mister Belvidere Goes to College, starring Clifton Webb
as mister Belvidere, Robert Stack as Bill, and Colleen.
Speaker 6: Gray as Ellen.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 4: Several days have gone by and mister Belvidere has adapted
himself to life in Clemens College, Or perhaps it should
be stated that Clemens College has adapted itself to life
with mister Belvidere. That is up till now, for mister
Belvidere has received an urgent message to report to the
office of Dean Gibbs.
Speaker 3: I have been waiting for you, mister Belvidere, for almost
an hour. Then let's not dalay doctor Gibbs. Mister Belvidere,
have you seen this today's issue The Daily Lion. I
gave that alleged newspaper the casual glance it deserves nothing more.
You have openly violated your agreement with President Keating. That
is not true. I did not say those things for publication.
Famous author Debunk's college traditions thinks, dinks stink. Female students
concentrate on nothing, but men athletes are subsidized. Mister Belverdeere,
my pithy observations Dean Gibbs were recorded by miss Baker
without my consent or knowledge, without your consent. Definitely, Therefore,
I intend to bring suit for libel, not only against
this aspiring young lady, but against the university. Now, mister
belvide let's not lose her. Hey, Mine is securely seated, sir.
But surely there must be a more sensible way of remedy.
There is, miss Baker, and the editors of this absurd
publication must be severely reprimanded. But we can't do that.
Why not? But this is a liberal university that the
faculty can't tell students what to write, that there'd be
a rouble in that event. I shall relieve the faculty
of this burden and take the matters into my own hands.
A good afternoon, but mister Belvidere, yeah, oh, good afternoon.
I would like.
Speaker 10: I'm sorry, but Missus Ashley isn't.
Speaker 3: Home, Missus Ashley, but I'm calling on miss Allen Baker.
Speaker 10: Oh that's a maiden name.
Speaker 3: How do you do, little boy.
Speaker 10: With Missus Ashley expecting you?
Speaker 3: Oh, yes, yes, she's expecting me.
Speaker 10: Well, I'm just the babysitter.
Speaker 6: I don't know whether I with me.
Speaker 3: I should be delighted. Don't point that same little boy.
Firearms are off for children for a doubt.
Speaker 10: It's just a mayd.
Speaker 15: You've been a good boy for Missus Hall, just as
good as gold Missus Ashley.
Speaker 3: With a little training, you can make a very fine
gangster out of him.
Speaker 10: Mister Belvedere, what are you doing here?
Speaker 3: Not half so fascinating, is what you're doing, Miss Baker,
He said, you're expecting him.
Speaker 10: It's all right, missus Haller. Just take Davy to his room.
Speaker 13: Will you come along, honey?
Speaker 3: By daddy, Daddy, Davy?
Speaker 10: This man is not your daddy. Now run along. Isn't
it a little presumptuous of you to come here uninvited?
Speaker 3: Isn't it equally presumptuous of you to write an article
about me without my consent, just because.
Speaker 10: I was enterprising enough to pick up information about it.
Speaker 3: What you wrote was not information. It was gossiped, and
in no less bad taste than if I were to
write about your private h peccadillos.
Speaker 10: Don't you dare call Davy a peccadillo his father.
Speaker 3: And I I am not the seat of judgment, miss Baker.
I am here merely to warn you that your future
flights into journalism must not be taken at the expense
of my name and reputation.
Speaker 10: Mister Belvedere, the truth is well, I've simply got to
write about you again in detail.
Speaker 3: And you expect me to consent.
Speaker 10: You must consent. It means everything to me and Davy.
When I first got the idea to write an article
about you for college paper. I saw possibilities way beyond.
Speaker 3: That, so you wrote to several national periodicals.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 3: This reply from Look magazine is most interesting. It mentions
the sum of five hundred dollars.
Speaker 10: You looked at that telegram on my desk?
Speaker 3: Naturally?
Speaker 13: What why?
Speaker 10: You're an unethical eavesdropper?
Speaker 3: Yes, I am.
Speaker 10: Let me write it. I'll write the best story you
ever saw. Please, mister Belvedere.
Speaker 13: It's the start of a.
Speaker 3: Career for me and the definite end of one for me.
Consent denied.
Speaker 10: All right, I'll do it anyway, and you can't stop me.
You're a public figure, and I don't need your.
Speaker 3: Permission, Miss Baker. I shouldn't if I were you.
Speaker 10: The least you could do is to give me a
little time to explain what this.
Speaker 3: Means to me, Miss Baker, I am still a freshman
at the Clemens University. As such, I am compelled to
attend the Sophomore Freshman track meet at four o'clock. Good day.
Speaker 16: The spares not time forty two parts from the sophomorees
twenty two parts for the Freshman next.
Speaker 6: And final event.
Speaker 9: Gee, mister Belvedere, how can you just sit here and
read a book? Didn't you hear what he said?
Speaker 6: The scores all time?
Speaker 3: I must ask you again, Cornelius, not to interrupt me. Furthermore,
the month of November is an extremely unlikely time for
young men to go flitting about in union suits. In
any event, Cornelius, Yes, get lost.
Speaker 16: Now on the field, hasten for the sophomores, Avery Pootaker.
Speaker 13: Look at him, mister Belvedere, that's him.
Speaker 3: That's Avery out there catching another cold. No doubt.
Speaker 7: He could re begger. There's twenty feet three inches for
the sophomore.
Speaker 9: No, no, we're dead, mister Belvidere, we're cold.
Speaker 3: Kindly stop giggling.
Speaker 9: You don't understand why Galloway can't come near twelve feet?
Speaker 1: Who is Galloway?
Speaker 9: He's all entry, the freshman entry in the pool bowl.
G mister Velvedere, how can you be so common peaceful?
And when these two dnks are.
Speaker 3: In the balance, I beg your pardon.
Speaker 9: Holy smoke, don't you know if we lose this poll
vault to the SOPs, we've lost the meat and we're
stuck with these dnks till next June. And if we win,
but we get rid of our dnks right now.
Speaker 3: Is into each life some rain, miss Paul. Mister Brubaker
is about to get drenched.
Speaker 13: Hey, where are you going, mister Belvedere?
Speaker 7: Hey, now, darling for.
Speaker 16: The freshman down Galloway and his third and final jump.
Speaker 6: The flower remains at twelve feet sleep.
Speaker 16: Hey, hey, everything was the scepter too? Hentry for the
freshman place the gallery there it's win Galvon there.
Speaker 3: I don't got this, mister Velvedere. Do you mean to
say you're gonna jump without even changing your claws or
pro or anything. I should roll up my trousers, young man.
That's what height did? Mister Boubaker clear the bar for three,
because that's a new high for him. Can you tell
the officials to set the bar at fourteen feet?
Speaker 10: Fourteen feet?
Speaker 6: Paul? Kay, mister Valvedere, Hi, you've been to Velvedere.
Speaker 1: Good afternoon, mister Boubiker.
Speaker 6: You know there are easier ways of committing suicide. The
guy your age, you'll break your back going up and
your legs coming down. All set.
Speaker 3: Gangway Please, you made it, mister.
Speaker 6: Belvedere, what a jump?
Speaker 1: Thank you?
Speaker 9: Do you realize it was just four inches off the
record set in nineteen twenty.
Speaker 6: Two by a guy named by a guy named.
Speaker 9: Now, wait a minute, it's right here in the record
book by guy named Lynn Velvedere.
Speaker 3: That is correct. Here have a dink.
Speaker 10: Thanks for such a wonderful evening, Bill or I don't
know when I've had such a nice time.
Speaker 1: I don't know when.
Speaker 3: Hide it either, Helen. Can't we can't We just sit
here for a while.
Speaker 10: You sound much too serious, Bill about you.
Speaker 1: I'm very serious, and there's.
Speaker 10: Something you'd better tell you. Bill. H oh, no, not
here in the car. You you'd better come upstairs with me.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 11: But when I called for you, you met me down here.
You said, the paint on the floorhead and dried.
Speaker 10: Well, uh h, I'm sure it's dry by Now let's
go up and find out.
Speaker 1: Say this is alright? Now, I don't blame you for
hiding out here.
Speaker 10: Just sit down.
Speaker 6: Bill.
Speaker 10: There's there's someone I want you to meet.
Speaker 1: Here we go again, the mysterious Mistaker.
Speaker 6: This is Hall.
Speaker 10: Oh hello, missus Ashley Davy asleep.
Speaker 6: Oh yes, he's been fine.
Speaker 10: Here's your money.
Speaker 13: Thanks again for coming anytime, missus Ashley.
Speaker 3: Good night? Oh hello, how do you do alright?
Speaker 1: Are you the one? I'm supposed to meet.
Speaker 3: I hardly think so.
Speaker 10: Come here, Bill, he's in here, he sh he's asleep.
Speaker 1: Hey, hey, what is this?
Speaker 10: Remember missus Ashley, the one who need a babysitter.
Speaker 1: They say he's kind of cute.
Speaker 10: H I think so, But then all mothers are prejudiced mothers.
That's going to the living room before he wakes up.
Speaker 3: Oh, Ellen, I I had no idea you would.
Speaker 10: He's mine, Bill n And here here's a picture of
his father, Air coois t. What are you there for?
Is Bomber group. He was killed two weeks before the
Japanese surrender.
Speaker 1: My, that's awful tough.
Speaker 10: It makes a difference, doesn't it.
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 1: Why I know it? But why have you kept it
such a secret.
Speaker 10: I've just tried to keep Davy separate from my college life.
That's why I came here at the last school, it
was no secret. And well, it took too many explanations.
Speaker 3: Like like now, huh.
Speaker 10: I just thought you ought to know.
Speaker 3: Oh, he's a he's a swell kid, Ellen.
Speaker 10: Bill, Let's be honest. The fact that I'm a widow
with a baby. It's it's just too much to take,
isn't it.
Speaker 1: Oh, you just sort of floored me. That's all.
Speaker 3: Look, I I.
Speaker 11: Better run along. I I still have some studying to do.
See in class tomorrow.
Speaker 10: Huh sure, see you in class tomorrow. Good night, Bill.
Speaker 3: Now take these groceries over to the cashier. Mister bou
Bicker charged them to the trigam house. I'll go to
the meat department and pick up the Take a yes,
mister Belvidere, and please stop sniffling. She was, mister Belvidere.
Ever since you became a sophomore, you've been picking on me,
and this will all see me back at tell mister
b Baker when next week I become a junior.
Speaker 6: Gosh, how fast things can change a fellow's life.
Speaker 13: Hi, Hi, you bo, But my name's Daisy.
Speaker 10: How you my daddy?
Speaker 6: Be Hi?
Speaker 10: Daddy?
Speaker 6: Oh no, wait a minute, if you're looking for your
old man? Oh hi, Ellen, heck, get a load of
this kid. You're sorry, mommy, Bobby. For Pete's sakes, Ellen,
is that yours?
Speaker 10: Yes, that's mine.
Speaker 6: Come on, davy, mister Belvidere, Hey, mister Belvidere, Ellen Baker's here.
She's just going out of the store.
Speaker 1: I have eyes, mister b Baker.
Speaker 6: Yeah, but she's got a kid. Ellen Baker's got a kid.
That's him with her.
Speaker 3: See no evil, mister b Baker.
Speaker 6: Yeah but she But yes, said mister Belvidere.
Speaker 15: Why Bill, come in, Sit down, Ellen.
Speaker 11: I I've wanted to talk to you for wealth of days.
Speaker 10: You don't have to explain, Bill, I understand now.
Speaker 1: I don't think you do well.
Speaker 10: You don't have to go through all this. You're doing
it because well, because you're nice and you feel you
ought to.
Speaker 3: You're never more wrong.
Speaker 10: I don't blame you. I told you before. I'm a
widow and I have a child. I know how you feel.
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe you're right.
Speaker 11: Maybe that was the way I felt you see you
you came at me kind of fast the other night. Well,
it's taken me until now to get up enough gumption
to face a competition.
Speaker 1: Davy and your husband, Bill.
Speaker 10: I loved my husband with a wonderful person. I married
him on leave. I guess we wrote more words and
letters than we ever got a chance to say to
each other in person. He was killed before Davy was born.
Speaker 3: You don't have to tell me all this, but I do.
Speaker 10: I'm proud I married him, Bill. I'm sorry he didn't
get to see your son. But but there's no competition.
Speaker 11: Ellam, I love you, don't you see? I want to
build a home perfect timing. That'll be my mother, your mother.
Speaker 10: Hello, oh, hello, missus Chase. Fine, thank you.
Speaker 3: She wants you to have dinner at the Try again tonight.
Speaker 10: I'd love to seven. Yes, I'll be there, missus Chase.
Thank you.
Speaker 3: I'll drop by after dinner. We'll give her the big news.
Speaker 10: You were pretty sure of yourself, wasn't it.
Speaker 1: Jump No, ma'am, I was pretty sure of you.
Speaker 10: Father.
Speaker 3: It's no breakful.
Speaker 13: You gave her the day off, mister Belvidere, and so
am I. Oh that turkey, I declare, I've never tasted
a turkey like that before.
Speaker 3: I have never heard a few like that before.
Speaker 6: Missus Chase, Yes, avre, missus Chase. Don't you have to
be a single girl to be a member of a sorority?
I mean, you can't have a family of belong can you? Well?
Of course? But how come they're all Russian? Ellen Baker
having her here for dinner and everything? Why she said,
we've got a little boy.
Speaker 3: She's what the dishes, mister b Baker, A little boy,
Missus Chase. There's no cause for alarms and excursions. Many
women have a son, yourself included. It requires no particular talent.
Speaker 13: But she said nothing about it to me. Now that
it Bill. But if there's a child, there must be
a husband.
Speaker 3: Not necessarily. Miss Baker is a relict. Relict means widow, Madame.
Speaker 6: That's what she says.
Speaker 3: Speak no evil, mister b Baker. What Missus Ashley says
or does is no concern of yours.
Speaker 13: Those dishes are well, it's a brave concern to me,
did you say, Missus Ashley.
Speaker 3: Yes, Ellen Baker Ashley, and she's no relation to the
Ashleys of Newport, Madam.
Speaker 13: Oh, excuse me, I'd better join the girl. And I
do think I should have been told miss Baker, after all,
I am Bill's mother.
Speaker 10: I'm sorry, Missus Chase, just that Bill asked me not
to say anything until he gets here. Naturally, he wanted
to be present when we told you about our engagement.
Speaker 13: Engagement.
Speaker 10: Well, yes, isn't that what you have said about?
Speaker 13: Oh, this only makes matters worse, Missus Ashley.
Speaker 10: Oh oh, I see, so mister Belvidere has been talking
to you. You've heard about my little.
Speaker 13: Boy, yes I have, and I must say that well
that I'm surprised.
Speaker 10: Yes, yes, I'm sure you are.
Speaker 13: Please, missus, actually, let me make myself perfectly clear.
Speaker 10: You've made yourself clear. You and mister Belvidere, good night, missus.
Speaker 7: Chase Ellen's Ellen is Bill.
Speaker 1: Ellen?
Speaker 6: What happened to till?
Speaker 10: Please?
Speaker 1: When I stopped by the Tribeam house to pick you up,
you are gone.
Speaker 10: Ask your mother what happened?
Speaker 6: I did? Ask her.
Speaker 11: I can't get anything out of her except my poor
boy and that unfortunate girl.
Speaker 1: What did my mother.
Speaker 10: Tell you everything that mister Belvidere told her when she
got through it.
Speaker 3: Come on, honey, calm down, you're all excited.
Speaker 10: That's right. Stick up for your mother. She's one hundred
percent right, and I'm one hundred percent Ellen.
Speaker 1: This is you and me. Let's leave mothers and kids
on it.
Speaker 10: Don't call Davy kids. You hate kids.
Speaker 13: You called him a little monster.
Speaker 11: I never but that was before I met the little
hold your feeing and very very unfair.
Speaker 10: Something told me not to get involved with a man
who has a mother.
Speaker 1: Everybody has a mother.
Speaker 10: You can't help you when she listens to people like
mister Belvidere. Well, this'll fix him. When I'm through this article?
Speaker 1: What article?
Speaker 6: Bill?
Speaker 10: Get out? Please? I want to finish it in mail
it to Look magazine tonight.
Speaker 1: But you can't do that.
Speaker 6: He'll be expelled and you'll be expelled.
Speaker 10: I simply won't argue with a man who's emotionally upset.
Speaker 1: I am emotionally upset.
Speaker 6: Holy smoke.
Speaker 11: You women don't make sense, you don't think straight, you
don't even Oh gosh, honey, what are we fighting about it?
Speaker 10: I've told you before. Ask your mother and ask mister Belvidere.
Speaker 6: All right, I will good night? Who is it?
Speaker 3: Belcha?
Speaker 1: I wanna talk to mister Belvidere over the play it?
Speaker 6: Who does that guy think he is? Mister Belvidere talk?
Do you like that? Yeah? The nerve? Are you cut
over on this door? Knock?
Speaker 3: The door's unlocked? Mister Chase, I oughta let you have.
I wouldn't wave your fists at me, mister Chase. I
think it only fair to mention that during my Japanese
period I taught judo at Tokyo University.
Speaker 11: Who told you to go sticking your student other people's business?
I find your language insulting.
Speaker 1: And obscure. I'm talking about Ellen and me.
Speaker 11: You filled my mother a lot of nonsense about Ellen,
and now she's called the whole thing off.
Speaker 3: Mister Chase, if you are under the delusion that I
have come between you and this young lady, that is
not true.
Speaker 1: A fine great you' bruin my life, of bruin Allen's life.
Speaker 3: Young man, unless I am mistaken, and I never ask.
Speaker 6: Ye, now that's right, he never is shut up.
Speaker 3: You have educated your metabolism to a point where your
behavior is quite adolescent adolessent. It is true that you
have a problem. Miss Baker is an attractive, intelligent, albeit
overly ambitious, young lady who has a baby match none
of your mother is a kindly, well meaning, albeit overly
possessive woman who has a son.
Speaker 1: Is that your business fact?
Speaker 3: That you have failed to reconcile the two points of
view to your advantages, your problem, mister Chase, not mine. Indeed,
I view the whole matter with complete and difference.
Speaker 1: I don't want to hear any more of you.
Speaker 5: It doesn't matter so much anyway, because you won't.
Speaker 1: Be around here much longer.
Speaker 3: And what do you mean by that? Just wait, wait
until Ellen drops her bombshell on you tonight.
Speaker 6: Gee, what a crisis? What's he talking about?
Speaker 5: Anyway?
Speaker 6: Ellen's going to drop a bobshell here tonight.
Speaker 3: Not here, mister Boo Baker in the mailbox.
Speaker 17: I fear, mister Belvidere, Where are you going? There's no
time to lose, But you can't go out that your pajamas.
If you'll kindly hand me my top coat, you'll catch
your death of cold. Apparently, Cornelius, you have never read
Admiral word story. I am the only member of the
expedition who didn't.
Speaker 6: Mister Belvedere, you can't go around the streets running around
like that. It's eleven o'clock at night, but Jabarrito week
isn't until April.
Speaker 3: Have no time in this emergency to take cognizance of
false mother story.
Speaker 6: Where are you going?
Speaker 3: I am calling a miss Ellen Baker. Good night, gentlemen.
We pause now for station identification.
Speaker 2: This is CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System.
Speaker 4: In a few moments we'll bring you the third act
of Mister Belvidere Goes to College. Our guest tonight is
Miss Helene Stanley, A brand new style of that twentieth
century Fox. I can see, Helene, why you passed your
screen test so easily. Red hair and a lovely lux complexion,
and that's a winning combination.
Speaker 18: Thank you very much, mister Kewy. But of course a
screen test is only the beginning. I'm so grateful for
the acting experience I've already had.
Speaker 5: You specialized in singing and dancing roles, haven't you.
Speaker 10: Yes, And that's why I spend so much time on
the set of Dancing in the Dark. It's a behind
the scenes story of studio.
Speaker 4: Life, with William Powell being his debonair self as a
famous actor.
Speaker 18: Isn't he wonderful?
Speaker 10: And Mark Stevens is a romantic lead.
Speaker 4: Yes, Dancing in the Dark is a happy experience altogether.
Speaker 5: Betsy Drake is a most engaging young songstress.
Speaker 10: Yes, and isn't she a joy to look at?
Speaker 1: And it's see she's a lux girl.
Speaker 18: Indeed she is, mister Kennedy, Betsy Drake has one of
the loveliest complexions I've ever seen, and I know she
depends on lux so facials to keep it that way.
Speaker 2: Like other Hollywood stars. She finds it's a beauty care
that works, you know. Actually, three out of four complexions
became softer smoother in a short time with Lux soap care.
Recent tests by skin specialists proved it.
Speaker 18: It's such an easy, effective care I know I wouldn't
leave about it.
Speaker 2: Thanks Miss Helene Stanley. I'm sure lovely women everywhere agree
that Lux Doiletap gives delicate skin gentle protecting care it needs.
If you haven't tried it, why not begin your Lux
soap facial tomorrow. Remember Lux Doiletap is the fragrant white
beauty soap. Nine out of ten famous screen stars you.
Here's our producer, mister William Keey.
Speaker 4: The curtain rises on the third act of Mister Belvidere
Goes to College, starring Clifton Webb as mister Belvidere, Colleen
Gray as Ellen, and Robert Styck as Bill. Thirty minutes ago,
mister Belvidere left the dormitory at Clemen's College and hastened
to Ellen Dager's apart. Now, there'd be nothing very unusual
about that, were it not for the fact that it's
late at night and mister Belvidere's attire consists of pajamas,
bedroom slippers and a top coat. Obviously, mister Belvidere is
very anxious to see Ella, but Ellen hasn't the slightest
desire to see him. She refused to open the door,
whereupon the very determined mister Belvidere has commenced an ascent
up the fire escape.
Speaker 19: All right, brother, and now slot climbing down that fire escape.
Speaker 1: I beg your pardon.
Speaker 20: We just happened to be police officers, mister, soll get
down here and start explaining.
Speaker 1: As you wish.
Speaker 3: Jethlemen, but I assure you this is a mistake.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and you made it. Look at him out in
pa Jermans yet stick out your miss brother, and no
false move.
Speaker 3: Stop calling me brother. I can conceive of no second
stance in which you and I could be remotely related.
Speaker 6: Come on, let's get him out of here.
Speaker 3: Oh, you can't do this to me. I'm a student
at the university and.
Speaker 6: Get here, malice student? How long you have been going
to school? Jack? Twenty years?
Speaker 3: There's a young lady in this apartment house who will
who knows me very well.
Speaker 19: Yeah, and I suppose you was calling Anaha exactly in pajamas. Okay,
wise guy, what's her name?
Speaker 3: Ellen Baker? That is missus David Ashley. And if you
don't believe me, why don't you ask her third floor apartment?
Speaker 6: D Well, let's take him up out.
Speaker 19: If this lady don't know him, this could develop into
a very interesting case.
Speaker 6: Okay, college boys, stop.
Speaker 3: For I did disturb your lady, but we found this
mother and a fire escape. He said he had to
see you.
Speaker 6: How about it, mister, you know this guy?
Speaker 3: Know him well? Miss Baker kind of identify me. We
may have had our differences, but I know I may
rely on your innate sense of fair plays.
Speaker 10: Officers. I never saw this man before in my life.
Speaker 6: That does it? Jack boy? Are you under arrest?
Speaker 1: May I inquire and put charge?
Speaker 6: Peeping Tom? Peeping top.
Speaker 10: Good night, officers, and thank you very.
Speaker 20: Much, Deeping Tom. Okay, what's your name? John J.
Speaker 1: Doe?
Speaker 6: A wise guy?
Speaker 1: Huh?
Speaker 20: Okay, mister Doe, we'll just dump you in the drunk
tank and refresh your memory. Take the handcuffs off your matter.
That will not be necessary.
Speaker 1: Here you are.
Speaker 20: Hey, Hey, you didn't lock the handcuffs.
Speaker 6: Of course I locked him the guy.
Speaker 3: So I talked, mister Hoodini.
Speaker 6: Frisk him, find out who he is?
Speaker 3: Yes, sure, sure, sergeant, you will long remember this dank,
turgent night. To your regret.
Speaker 6: You sure this guy ain't top heavy.
Speaker 3: You would discover that I'm no more saying and much
more saying than you are.
Speaker 6: To wit.
Speaker 3: I know that you have the legal right to hold
me for forty eight hours. I also know that I have
the right to make one telephone call.
Speaker 6: Yeah, who do you think is running this joint?
Speaker 3: You are, sir, and I suggest you enjoy it.
Speaker 6: You may you don't scare me.
Speaker 20: Pop.
Speaker 6: All right, there's the phone booth. Make your legal call.
Speaker 3: Number. Please, operator, this is Lynn Belvidere. I want to
call Washington, DC, person to person and reverse the charges
with whom do you wish to speak please, mister j
Edgar Hoover?
Speaker 6: Okay, Sarge, did you hear him?
Speaker 1: Jay go Hoover?
Speaker 20: I heard him throw him in a drunk tank. Hey,
you belvy, Sarge.
Speaker 6: Look look at him. He's standing on his head.
Speaker 3: You should try it sometime, yoga, very refreshing. Well, sergeant,
has my call from Washington Comprove.
Speaker 20: Not yet, and don't give us any more of that stuff.
We call the local FBI. See nobody ever heard of it?
Speaker 1: They shall.
Speaker 6: In the meantime, there's some people here to see it.
Speaker 1: I show them in please outside this tank.
Speaker 6: E'e no parlor, mister.
Speaker 3: That is quite apparent. Ad dear classmates, sur long chim
and thanks.
Speaker 6: We'll showing us how to pick the lock. You showed them.
Speaker 3: What you'll find out, Sergeant, you'll find out.
Speaker 13: There he is, mister Brubaker, there's mister Belvidere.
Speaker 6: You okay, mister Belvidere.
Speaker 9: I was the one who brought missus chasing everyone, mister Belvedere.
Speaker 3: In time, I shall determine whether to thank you or not. Cornelius.
Speaker 20: Well, mister Belvidere, this here, young lady, has explained everything
about knowing you.
Speaker 3: That is good evening, Ellen, good evening.
Speaker 20: So we'll call it all a mistake, mister Belvidere, and
drop the whole thing.
Speaker 6: Okay.
Speaker 3: On the contrary, I shall fight my arrest through to
the highest authority and find Amanda hearing.
Speaker 6: And now gee, another crisis. But she dropped the charges.
Speaker 1: Miss Baker.
Speaker 3: Why did you drop the charge because I couldn't sleep?
That was your conscience. I slept perfectly.
Speaker 6: Yeah, he sleeps upside down.
Speaker 10: I just can't stand here, sergeant, and swear I've never
seen him before, because I have seen him before, but
I hope I never see him again. And that goes
for one or two other people here too.
Speaker 3: Well, if you only listen to me, Ellen Belvidere.
Speaker 13: I wish you could do something to bring them together.
Ellen won't speak to Bill and Bill won't speak to me.
Speaker 3: Oh please, what is in that envelope, young lady?
Speaker 10: The article I wrote about you for Loof magazine?
Speaker 3: Why haven't you mailed it?
Speaker 10: Because I just finished.
Speaker 1: I won't let her mail up.
Speaker 6: That's why.
Speaker 10: Just try and stop me.
Speaker 3: You'll be foolish to try, mister Chase. Let her bless
my college career and her own. Let her go on
to a shabby success, dragging her ill fed offspring behind her.
Speaker 1: Are they nothing shabby about her own success? And Davies?
Speaker 3: No, ill fed offspring is a.
Speaker 6: Darn fine with Yes.
Speaker 3: Yes, I'm sure you can't keep out of this mother, Oh,
missus Chase, be wary of women who are hagridden with
emotion and ambition.
Speaker 12: I am not.
Speaker 13: I am not hagridden with ambition.
Speaker 10: I'm just I'm just tired.
Speaker 3: On God and God, mister Chase, one does not reason
with an emotional young woman.
Speaker 10: I'm not emotional. All I want to do is graduate
from college and keep davy and have a home. Yes,
all right, here take your old story.
Speaker 1: Thank you.
Speaker 20: Look, would you partis mind continuing this outside my police station?
Speaker 19: Hello? Yep, yep, huh yeah, he's right here. It's for you,
mister Belbert there from Washington.
Speaker 3: Thank you.
Speaker 1: Hello, hello Edgar.
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, there was some trouble, but I've taken care
of it myself. Oh no, no, I don't think it
will be necessary. Oh and you too, well, well, thanks
for calling Edgar. Goodbye. Any question, sergeant.
Speaker 6: Oh no, sir, no question, sir. Would you like a
squad car to drive you home?
Speaker 7: Maybe?
Speaker 3: Thank you, thank you, But I shall walk home to
the dormitory with Cornelius.
Speaker 9: She wis j Edgar Hoover. Oh thanks, mister Belvidere. I'll
enjoy the walk very much.
Speaker 3: Good night, everyone, I'm along Cornelia.
Speaker 7: Come again.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 3: My instructors are quite simple, Cornelia's, but you will kindly
repeat them.
Speaker 6: Oh sure, mister Belvidere.
Speaker 9: I take this envelope that miss Baker gave you to
the all night drug store, and I buy some stamps
and I mail it.
Speaker 6: She is, mister Belvidere. You think I was dumb or.
Speaker 3: Something far from it, Cornelius.
Speaker 9: But well, there's one thing I don't get. I thought
all this was because you didn't want the magazine to print.
Speaker 3: Never mind that, Cornelias. And if you know what's good
for you, remember that in a few short weeks, I
shall be a senior.
Speaker 6: Oh.
Speaker 9: I won't tell anybody, mister Belvidere, not even j A
dr Horse.
Speaker 3: And now, now, ladies and gentlemen, we come to the
closing chapter in the seventy fifth Commencement Exercises of Clemens University,
the presentation of the diploma to a man who has
singularly distinguished himself in the outside world as well as
in our own academic world.
Speaker 11: Well, they finally got around here, mister Beres, the most
boring ceremony I've held him as fortune to witness since
they gave me the moor House Award.
Speaker 3: I wooma valedictorian, the only man in the long history
of Clemmons to have earned his degree in one year,
mister Lynn Belvidere.
Speaker 8: Mister Belvidere, congratulations, you are not only a great scholar,
but a man of principle. And I want to thank
you for keeping your bargain. Bargain, President Keating, about the
publicity of notoriety, I mean, oh not at all.
Speaker 3: President Keating. And now it gives me great pleasure to
hand you your diploma. Thank you, Dean Gibbs. And it
gives me great pleasure to present you with this. But
mister Belvidere a copy of Look magazine the cover.
Speaker 8: Look what it says, mister Belvidere goes to college by
Ellen Baker Ashley.
Speaker 3: I kept my word, sir. Remember you just graduated me
and a picture of us here on the stage handing
you your diploma, by mister Belvidere. This just happened. This
is impossible, Yes, yes it is.
Speaker 4: We certainly don't need any cheerleaders to let our stars
know how much we like mister Belvidere goes to college.
Now it's curtain called time for Clifton Webb, Colleen Gray
and Robert Stagg. Clifton, as mister Belvidere, you've certainly.
Speaker 3: Done of the game. Yes, I find it most depressing.
Speaker 10: Depressing, depressing to be famous.
Speaker 1: Well, there should be a certain dash to success.
Speaker 3: Now, after some thirty years in the theater, I find
it depressing to achieve notoriety as a babysitter and a
pole vaulter.
Speaker 1: Oh you you don't like this fame?
Speaker 3: Manha, I love it, you know.
Speaker 11: I'm sure the audience wants to know about the future
mister Belvidere.
Speaker 3: Well, mister Belvidere is never predictable. Only one thing is
certain about his future. It'll never be done.
Speaker 10: He always has something new, just like Luck Soap. I've
used Lux soap for years, but as a complexion care.
And now they've brought out the new bath size. Don't
you think the new bath size of Luck Soap is grand?
Mister Webb, my.
Speaker 3: Dear, don't be naive. Who do you think invented the
new bath size?
Speaker 10: You mean it was?
Speaker 3: It was mister Belvedere, that is correct.
Speaker 11: I'm sure mister Belvidere already knows. But you might tell
the rest of us about next week's play bill.
Speaker 1: Well, next week's.
Speaker 5: Play is tuneful, it's amusing, it's romantic.
Speaker 1: And as for the.
Speaker 4: Stars, three of your favorites, Robert Cummings and Blythe and
William Bendix. The play is a gay musical story for
the whole family. The Universal International Picture.
Speaker 1: I'll be yours.
Speaker 3: That's a very entertaining prospect. Bill, good Night, good night,
good night, and come again.