OSRIC, Shadows of the Pale Ep18

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Our adventuring friends are within the Manor, drawing the ire of a couple of it's large inhabitants.  one fight leads to another, and the net of their enemies draws ever closer...

Shadows of the Pale is our house written Season 4 OSRIC mini(?) campaign where we play the amazing third edition of the OSRIC rule set. (retroclone of the first advanced edition of the worlds most well known role playing game, available through Mythmere games, or free pdf from DrivethruRPG)  This story is set in the fabled World of Greyhawk fantasy setting, on the border between the Duchy of Tenh and the Theocracy of the Pale; and features wilderness exploration, a tense political backdrop, and the creeping long arm of the ominous Empire of Iuz...

Featuring:

Bryan (AKA Doc) as Reyes Monin, fighter, displaced noble, straight ahead action enthusiast, likes being big, seeker of treasure and XP.

Rodney as Pindar, Fighter/mage, pureblooded half-elf, second rank spear wielder, deviser of many plans, knower of moon phases.

Shawn M as Merrick Thornleaf,  Fighter/thief, Halfling, scout, Agent provocateur against The Pale, devils advocate, roller of ones.

John A as Theron,  Elven Mage,  mule owner, onetime seeker of Gelatinous Groundhogs, puts a big C on his CG alignment.

Eric as Edric,  Human Cleric.  either does not know or will not disclose his favored diety, reluctant yet ineffective healer, often the first into the fray.

Shawn G as GM, deviser of plots that might be deadly if he rolled better in combat, awkward NPC portrayer.  Edits and produces whatever this is.

Please visit our sponsor, and publisher of OSRIC, other wonderful RPGs and The Tome of Adventure Design, Mythmere Games!

www.mythmeregames.com

sign up to be notified of their new Backerkit campaign for the World of Jordoba!

https://www.backerkit.com/c/projects/mythmere-games/the-world-of-jordoba/pre-launch

#ad&d #Osric #OSR #ttrpg #actualplay #rpg #Dnd #oldschoolrpg #tabletoprpg #retrogaming #greyhawk 

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1 SPEAKER_01: This time on Retro Rollcast.

I believe the rule was, and I can't remember exactly where we

talked about this before, right?

Where if you are charged, you get to make your attack first.

Yes.

If you have a longer weapon than the Trevor Burrus, I don't even

think that was part of it.

But it's for me, it's irrelevant.

It's for him that I'm curious about it.

But anyway, here's my rule.

I got a really big long sword.

A 13, which will hit armor class two.

My spear is set for a charge, right?

So he's charging in.

SPEAKER_00: He's really gung home.

I haven't announced what the ogre has done yet.

He's charging me.

I'm already doing it.

That's 11 points of damage.

These dice haven't even decided what we've taken over.

Welcome back to Retro Worldcast.

And none of you out there want to know what we've just been

talking about.

But moving ahead, we are back in the attic of Doom, presumably

for the next six months, probably?

SPEAKER_01: Forever, because we're going to do the work to

mix the attic so we can close it off and air condition it.

SPEAKER_03: What's the DC?

What's the DC on us upgrading the room?

SPEAKER_01: To get started or to do work?

To get started.

Oh, that must be a 20.

That's a 20.

Here we go.

I rolled a 20.

Oh my god, it starts at 20.

If it was less than 20.

SPEAKER_00: That's the one.

SPEAKER_01: Once we get started, it's an eight.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: It definitely goes down.

SPEAKER_00: Once we get started, it's an afternoon.

Right.

No, it's more than that.

No, it's not.

SPEAKER_03: No.

SPEAKER_00: Not if all of us are here.

But anyway, this is not a game room construction podcast.

But it could be God, because we would have zero episodes.

Actually, hang on a sec.

Oh, right.

I didn't I didn't change the levels, but you really clipped

there.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah, he really was.

That's because he was leaning in and like he was excited.

Very excited.

SPEAKER_00: But anyway, we're we are here in the Attic of Doom.

We are ready to get moving with the campaign.

To my left, Eric is playing Edric, the cleric of

Triceratops.

Trimester.

Triceratops.

SPEAKER_01: Trimestern.

I looked up a whole bunch of tri words to call his Trihard.

It's the libertarian god of Trident.

Of Ron Swanson.

SPEAKER_02: I'm still giving it.

It's easier to explain.

SPEAKER_01: Anyway.

Apparently.

And if they make fun of your god, you have every right to

smite them down.

Cthulhu would appreciate it.

Also on my left, he doesn't care.

SPEAKER_00: Next is Theran, the elf.

And you haven't been involved very much in the last episode.

Are you doing all right?

SPEAKER_02: Everything stay back.

SPEAKER_00: They're in the wondrous.

They get a little nervous when you start get that wand out.

Getting your wand out.

Theoran of the Poke Style.

SPEAKER_02: It's done nothing but been helpful.

It's been helpful.

Helpful and fun.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I get nervous when Theoran gets his wand out.

SPEAKER_00: It's been helpful or fun.

SPEAKER_01: It's been interesting.

SPEAKER_00: It's right.

Something has happened every time.

Straight across the table is Sean, who is playing Merrick

Thornleaf.

Indeed.

And you just met somebody you knew at NPC that you were aware

of, Nim from the Half-Link Thorpe.

SPEAKER_02: Nim's not bright.

SPEAKER_00: If I said a different name in the last

podcast, it's Nim.

SPEAKER_03: Okay.

I think it was different.

Sounds about right.

SPEAKER_00: No, it was a single syllable.

I don't know.

I'm three balling back here sometimes.

Wow.

TMI, bro.

SPEAKER_03: Damn, dude.

I am not sitting in this seat anymore.

SPEAKER_00: Keep him near the window.

Getting ready to provide support for Lord Reyes is Pindar the

Half Elder.

The herald.

The herald of Lord Reyes.

SPEAKER_01: And if you need a visual representation, think of

the guy with the coconuts in Holy Grail following the night.

Patsy?

unknown: Yes.

SPEAKER_00: Brave Patsy.

Right.

Who served us well.

Right.

Who will not have been mortally wounded in vain.

SPEAKER_01: Exactly.

That's what I picked up.

Indar is very alive.

He's not dead yet.

SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah, you guys had a very quick fight with

Spider last time.

SPEAKER_01: Well, two people did anyway.

SPEAKER_00: I was hoping we would like make a save versus

poison or die.

SPEAKER_01: That's what I was hoping for.

SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we got that covered.

And last but certainly not least, the aforementioned Lord

Reyes Monin from the case.

SPEAKER_03: No, where this Lord came from.

That's written right there on your sheet.

Yeah, talking about Lord.

Lord Edrig.

Oh, I can't read your writing.

I know, no, I can't either.

SPEAKER_01: It just looked just like your name to me.

We both have that problem.

Look, I may go around introducing you as Lord because

it's people call you Lord.

You're right.

This is step it till you make it, right?

Right?

And we've been faking it for four years on this podcast.

SPEAKER_00: But I'm not sure he wants to be Lord.

That's a bit of a thing in Medicine.

SPEAKER_01: I am a reluctant leader.

He wants the costume, just none of the responsibility.

Yes.

I want a cape.

You can kiss my brain.

SPEAKER_03: A cape would kick out.

Exactly.

A cape would be real awesome.

You don't have one?

No.

Nor do I have a horn.

I really want like a battle.

SPEAKER_01: If you went back to that giant spider and hollowed

out one of its legs, the chitin could act as a horn.

I don't know the physics of this.

You just got to blow right.

I'm not a loot guy.

What does a loot guy have to do with nothing?

They know instruments.

They know instruments.

Are there stranges?

I get it.

I called the musician.

Yeah, thank you.

SPEAKER_00: Don't we have a bunch of cattle?

Is there any bulls in that herd?

Well, that's in the woods along the way.

Yeah, we lost it.

We lost the cow a long time ago.

I don't know.

You guys had a sack of salted pork in your possession.

Barrels.

Barrels of salted pork, I think.

SPEAKER_01: Right.

Well you put it in.

SPEAKER_00: Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: But we don't have that in our possession anymore.

Unless our wizard had a whole sack of salted meat.

Oh, good.

Because I don't have any I don't know that I have a lot of

rations.

We have like three rations left.

Am I the only one that like took salted pork and like made it the

equivalent of rations?

You're the one who did it without saying, hey, we should

probably all do this.

SPEAKER_00: No, all of your characters are very food

focused.

That's fair.

SPEAKER_01: It's a quality of that.

SPEAKER_00: It's definitely a thing.

SPEAKER_01: Well, it's a number that diminishes in our character

sheet that we have to work to replenish, but we're not worried

about.

Maybe most people don't play like that, but hey, eventually,

like we're gonna run out of food and we're days away.

We gotta have a supply.

There's a big old spider right there.

I'm not eating that thing.

SPEAKER_00: But before we get into the to the action this

time.

Action.

If action there is to be.

We want to mention our sponsor, which is Myth Mere Games.

Mythmere Games writes, produces, prints, and publishes the game

that we're playing, which is Osric, which is a restatement of

first edition A D, done so that people can easily read it,

understand it, and play with it.

What is the license under which he wrote Osric?

SPEAKER_01: Uh yeah, I think he did his own license negotiated.

Not OGL, it's not the Creative Commons thing.

SPEAKER_00: Third party license version 1.1.

Shall we?

Is this gonna be our promo this time?

We'll just read the license.

SPEAKER_01: That'll be super fun.

That will definitely sell books.

It's a little dumb.

Hold on.

Let me just read this part right here.

That sounds very count to four.

What?

We're idiots tonight.

We really are.

No, we're idiots all the time.

We're getting punchy.

Like you guys get close to bed.

SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah, like a very long time.

I think the Halloween episode last year was the last time we

played at night.

Attic wasn't many of us work today.

It's warm in here.

But anyway, all those are excuses, and Myth Mirror does

not deserve our excuses.

We want to talk about um, you know, they they publish Osric,

they publish Swords and Wizardry.

They are soon to publish the world of Jordoba via a backer

kit that you can access in the link in the show notes, although

that has been pushed back to January 2027.

So keep posted with that if that's something you're

interested in.

They also published something called the Tome of Adventure

Design, which I didn't use to design this adventure.

Possibly if I had, it would be better.

SPEAKER_01: Maybe they would have detailed the type of

trapdoor that you put in the last episode.

Well, I did that.

I know.

We know you did.

But maybe the team would have been venture design by too much.

SPEAKER_00: That is a vast book, and it has many things that can

be generated.

I don't know if it gets into the minutiae of trapdoor.

So you're saying it's not that granular.

Well, I think that's it's very granular.

SPEAKER_01: I just don't know if it's that granular.

Right.

Trapdoor handle granular.

That's pretty out there.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: And as we've seen in the last episode, there are

different interpretations of what a hatch would look like.

SPEAKER_00: Right, right.

Right.

And that's sort of a communication thing, right?

But like we are notorious.

We all have our own thoughts as to what a thing is.

SPEAKER_03: We have our own thoughts, our own things that we

hear when people say things.

Like it might be one thing and you hear something else.

SPEAKER_00: Right.

SPEAKER_01: That's dangerous territory, right?

We all have wives.

SPEAKER_00: But all of these wonderful things can be gotten

from mythmeregames.com.

Go to their online store.

Their book printing quality is fantastic, and you can get the

entire Oseric system for a hundred bucks in hardcover.

In either landscape or portrait form, you can get the tome of

adventure design.

One thing that isn't mentioned too often, the tables of the

tome of adventure design.

Actually, there is a product on Steam for PC and Mac called the

Fantasy Adventure Builder, which was developed from the Tome of

Adventure design.

Perfect for lazy people like me.

Yes, who if you can't be bothered to roll some percentile

dice, it will do it for you.

SPEAKER_03: And we all know how you are with dice.

SPEAKER_00: But moving on to the adventure, last time you uh

crept towards the manor, uh, you crept through a root and wine

cellar tunnel underneath the manor's edge.

You encountered and killed a spider, you blocked off the exit

point of many more spiders, and you had a brief conversation

with some kitchen slaves in the ogre's manor.

Currently, there you are on one side of a trapdoor from the

manor.

Now, this trapdoor, because I didn't describe it adequately

last time, is simply a lid over top.

It does not have a hinge, it does not have a handle.

It is merely sitting atop of the egress point of the tunnel.

SPEAKER_03: So you're saying it's like almost flat bottomed,

if you will.

SPEAKER_00: It's like a plug.

Right.

SPEAKER_03: Right.

Okay.

I think I got it.

SPEAKER_00: It is held in place by gravity alone.

SPEAKER_03: I think I see what's going on in my mind's eye here.

SPEAKER_01: And was there was uh an MPC hapling named NIM NIM.

NIM.

NIM.

Like the secret of the secret of NIM.

Right.

Although they're not supposed to say.

So the ogres that were there, did they leave?

SPEAKER_00: I don't know.

SPEAKER_01: They're not there now.

Do you hear them?

I don't know.

I don't know.

He said they'll be back.

Well, that's his kitchen.

Of course they'll be back.

SPEAKER_03: Okay, well, should we go up in the kitchen and

hide?

SPEAKER_00: Well, most recently you had heard some heavy

footsteps approaching.

Uh, you didn't really hear them leave yet.

SPEAKER_01: Okay, that was what I'm getting at.

Somehow we're gonna have to get out this hatch or we go storm

the front gate.

Don't we have a druid?

Can't they poison the ogres and their food or something?

The druid druids in the somewhere else.

Remember, that's an evil act, and none of us are evil.

No, you're doing it to evil creatures.

It's a good act.

SPEAKER_00: Is that how that works?

SPEAKER_01: I don't think so.

Sure.

SPEAKER_03: No.

No.

No.

SPEAKER_02: As long as you get what you want.

Do the ends.

SPEAKER_01: That's not why the means.

Are you doing it to rescue slaves?

That'd be neutral.

I don't think we're not going to be able to do that.

You're saying this to me like it matters to me.

We don't have any poison.

We don't have a druid.

All of those things are irrelevant.

We have none.

We could go everywhere.

There is a druid on another character sheet.

Yes.

Eight episodes later, look for us back here with a druid.

I will go back in time.

Right.

So we're going to wait for them to leave, and then what are we

going to just do?

I know.

I take my potion of gaseous form.

There you go.

Put it in the stew.

They all eat the stew, become gaseous, and we eliminate them

from the equation.

The plan stops at that point.

SPEAKER_03: And that's ended.

The name plays out.

Win is at the end of the day.

It works.

I thought literally that you were going to drink the potion

of gaseous form, get in the stew, have them eat you, and

then you would.

SPEAKER_01: The way that was explained was I was a little

awkward.

Or better yet, remember what I said about the spider?

This was the worst idea.

How does a gas worst stew?

I'm calling on the carbonated beverage.

Carbonated stew.

So they're gaseous.

Well, here's the problem with your logic.

Then we can have our way.

I'm not saying that the gas goes into the stew.

I'm saying the potion goes into the stew.

Okay.

SPEAKER_00: They consume the stew.

Well, and then we're going to be able to do that.

Actually, I was addressing Rodney's idea of you drinking

the gaseest form.

That was me.

And then going into the stew.

SPEAKER_01: Oh, I gotcha.

I gotcha.

Right.

And I thought, like when he started off with his idea of I

drink the potion of gaseous form, I thought that might have

been a legitimate idea coming forth.

And instead it was just us again.

Yeah.

So isn't that valid?

All right.

Are there did the ogres leave?

Gotta get up there.

Maybe they'd become a little bit more.

I climbed the ladder.

Okay.

Hey Nim.

I'm the one.

I'm the one guy.

I'm the guy you didn't get introduced to last time.

I'm uh Harold Pindar.

Are the ogres gone?

Well, if they're not, they know you're here now.

He would have been so steps on the door.

There's two of us in the great room.

How far is the great room?

SPEAKER_00: On the other side of the doorway.

SPEAKER_01: Is Belnek here?

What?

Is Belmach here?

Belmach?

SPEAKER_00: I haven't seen him in a while.

SPEAKER_01: What about Mosic or Grosik, whichever that giant is?

Is he here?

SPEAKER_00: No, he never comes here.

SPEAKER_01: So two ogres who keep Alright.

I'm coming up.

SPEAKER_00: Are you sure are you sure?

SPEAKER_01: Look, at this point something's gotta happen.

Stuff coming up.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you lift the lid straight off of its

straight off.

And I just push it off to the side.

Yes.

SPEAKER_01: Because it's not on hinges, and I just lift it up

and I move it over.

As quiet as you can do that.

You don't have anything to grab it with.

Arm.

Reverse gravity.

And then I climb up the rest of the way.

I'm right after.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you find yourself in a there's a couple

of candles providing light in the room, but you're in a

kitchen.

Okay, right.

You're in sort of the corner of a kitchen.

There are bubbling pots.

There's the you know, there's the smell of some form of stew

bubbling away.

There does look to be some bread over on a on a counter.

SPEAKER_01: I walk over and start eating some.

It's been all day.

Um I'm really hungry.

I'm gonna fight some ogres here in a minute.

I'm gonna need some food.

SPEAKER_00: Low blood sugar carve up here before combat.

That's it.

We're all pissy from low blood sugar.

Maggoty bread.

Except we had wings and pizza before we came above.

SPEAKER_01: So many openings are into this in this room.

SPEAKER_00: There's one sort of large doorway leading into a

brighter lit room, and there's some light flooding in.

But it's door's the trapdoor is about seven feet from that

opening.

SPEAKER_01: But it's an opening, not a door.

SPEAKER_00: Correct.

SPEAKER_01: Okay.

SPEAKER_00: It's like an archway.

SPEAKER_01: Okay.

And that's the only way in or out of this room.

SPEAKER_00: But that you can see, yeah.

SPEAKER_01: But I can see.

All right, so I get up and I trapdoor and I get ready to

cover the door.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you sidle over to the door.

You can hear some low.

SPEAKER_01: And I'm just waiting for my companions to come up to

the left Harley guys from South.

SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm staying out of s try to stay out of

sight line.

Obviously first.

SPEAKER_00: Right.

The the trap door doesn't open within sight line on you.

Right.

We don't want to stay then pinned to the right wall.

Of the great room.

Right.

The rest of you guys, what are you guys doing?

Edric.

SPEAKER_02: I don't know if I like this idea.

I am going to follow them up the ladder.

SPEAKER_00: You're going to go up the ladder.

Third Theorin.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so follow them up the ladder.

SPEAKER_00: Merrick.

SPEAKER_01: I will bring up the rear.

Okay.

But I'm going to stay like on the ladder until I see what's

going on.

Alrighty.

Spiders.

Somebody gotta be around to rescue them when they're in

jail.

Right?

SPEAKER_02: They're making it to jail.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah.

Well.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you can't.

You all manage to climb up into the kitchen.

In there, Nim and the uh and the god human ha have have wide

eyes.

And you hear you see them nod.

SPEAKER_01: Where's this other slaves?

SPEAKER_00: In the in in Mosaic's area.

SPEAKER_01: How do we get there?

SPEAKER_00: Is it far?

It's on the other side of the manor.

SPEAKER_01: Okay.

So would we be better off going back down through the might come

in at any moment.

SPEAKER_03: There's no way to go down through that hole in the

other it's gonna take us out back out to the door.

Right.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

SPEAKER_03: Actually, this is right up going right up as close

as I can to the doorway.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

Just going up to it?

SPEAKER_03: Without pulling through, yeah, I don't want to

draw attention.

Just get right at the edge of the door.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

So you and Pindar are right there by the entrance, Edric?

SPEAKER_02: I was gonna ask if it's possible to be on either

side of the door in a hidden way, or is it not enough room?

SPEAKER_00: There is not really enough room.

There's like a foot between the end of the archway and the end

of the far wall.

SPEAKER_02: Okay.

SPEAKER_00: So you back up in the room, Thieran?

SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna grab breakfast.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

SPEAKER_02: Good call.

SPEAKER_00: So after Pindar has a hunk of bread, Thieron goes

over.

Are you having bread or stew?

There's like some bowls and a ladle there.

SPEAKER_02: Probably just start with some bread.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, just have a stew.

Merrick, you're standing on top of the of the ladder watching

him snack and these guys get over by the doorway and him back

up.

SPEAKER_02: Okay.

Don't know what the bread's made of.

SPEAKER_00: Or what's in the stew.

SPEAKER_02: Well, in the stew they're staying away from.

SPEAKER_00: Here's the rumbling of the conversation in the other

room.

Fireball.

SPEAKER_03: Can we make out how many different voices there are?

SPEAKER_00: In the time that you can hear two.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah, he did mention two.

SPEAKER_00: Alright.

You're all there.

SPEAKER_01: And there's no other doors in or out of here, right?

I'm in the top of the ladder.

He's in the turret.

No other doors.

And this is the entry out right than the hall.

SPEAKER_00: There's like some slats in the like some thin

vents in the walls.

Right.

But you wouldn't even call them a window.

No, no.

SPEAKER_01: That's fine.

SPEAKER_00: I just want to make sure that there's no other way

in.

SPEAKER_01: Take a look and see what that's don't work.

I'm done asking Merrick to do things.

SPEAKER_00: The conversation in the other room comes to an end.

I stopped.

And you hear the scrape of a chair on a stone floor.

SPEAKER_01: I ready?

This is where it hits the shan.

Somebody's getting up.

SPEAKER_03: Coming our way.

SPEAKER_00: And you hear the slow shuffling steps of a large

individual heading towards the I'm gonna get some more stew.

SPEAKER_01: As soon as he comes in, I'm gonna freaking attack.

Okay.

Plam.

Try to get a drop on him.

Yeah, but as soon as that guy pokes any part of himself around

the corner, I'm stabbing him.

Okay.

Or whatever the opening, or if Reyes jumps out first, obviously

I do my second rank fighter thing.

Hey, there's another one out there though.

We gotta take this guy down quick.

Yep.

Roll me a D six.

Alright.

This one has rolled so many ones that it's due for a six, so it

won't surprise anybody.

A five.

And that was a five.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

unknown: So

SPEAKER_00: So that's bad.

That's not initiative.

That was the surprise roll.

SPEAKER_01: Right.

We did not surprise him, but we still could have initiative.

SPEAKER_00: So you two are by the door.

Yes.

And you're gonna stab as soon as it comes within view.

Edric.

SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna charge it.

SPEAKER_00: You see the guy tensing up.

SPEAKER_02: Yep.

I'm gonna charge it as soon as it comes in.

SPEAKER_00: So you're charging as soon as you have to be able

to get the channel.

You're charging.

Theoret.

SPEAKER_02: I'm stained to the back and holding my action.

SPEAKER_00: With a piece of bread in your hand.

With a piece of bread.

It's hard to cast a scarcity.

Oh, sure.

You're not a halfling.

All right.

And Merrick, you see everybody tense up.

Get ready to standing on top of the ladder.

Get ready to drop down the ladder.

Okay.

Roll initiative.

SPEAKER_01: Don't make it be me.

Three.

That's not terrible.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

Slightly.

On segment six, because you guys are all in sort of a held

action.

SPEAKER_01: Right.

We can't do it until he gets there.

SPEAKER_00: The ogre rounds the and he thrusts.

At the same second he rounds, he sees the two of you.

He sees the glint of metal.

Right.

And attack.

It will be simultaneous.

SPEAKER_01: He missed.

That is armor class five.

That actually 14.

Oh, I I forgot how math works.

That's armor class four.

SPEAKER_00: That goes tough.

Alright, that does hit.

How long have you been playing this game?

SPEAKER_01: Not long enough.

I could it could be five, too, for all I know.

Actually, it is five.

Do I miss on five?

Because I did as no, actually you hit.

AC5 hits?

Alright.

And four points of damage.

SPEAKER_00: Minimum.

Minimum.

SPEAKER_01: Things never change.

SPEAKER_00: Alright, Reyes.

SPEAKER_01: So does an AC six hit?

SPEAKER_00: No.

He's lucky.

Your charge will be next segment.

The ogre swipes at one to three is him, four to six is you.

What is it?

Two.

Okay.

It swipes at Reyes.

Damage.

Hits armor class of zero.

SPEAKER_01: Yep.

So much for that working out the way.

We still got one more attack.

Do we get two attacks this round?

SPEAKER_03: I get three every two.

SPEAKER_01: Well, me too, but I didn't know because your first.

SPEAKER_03: Yeah, your the first round you get your multiple.

SPEAKER_00: Four points of damage.

SPEAKER_03: Okie dokie.

SPEAKER_00: And you hear the start of surprise from the

other.

The other one's surprised.

SPEAKER_02: He's eating all the soup.

SPEAKER_00: Edric, you're charged.

SPEAKER_02: I'm in charge.

Well, that's bad.

D trip channel.

Not one bad.

Armor class of fourteen.

Okay.

SPEAKER_00: So no.

That's with a taco, so that means double chip.

Armor class of four.

Alright, next round actions.

Resolve my second round.

I get resolved my second round.

Okay.

SPEAKER_01: We both get second attacks this round if we're

doing the three to two.

That's gonna hit AC negative three.

Okay, go ahead.

I am assuming he's large.

Yes, he's large.

Go ahead.

You got yours first.

I hit mine as well.

I rolled the exact same numbers last time.

That's max damage.

SPEAKER_00: Sixteen.

SPEAKER_01: Right.

Sixteen.

SPEAKER_00: Oh, you savage this thing.

And then they didn't show five from me.

And the skewer from the spear, from the half elf, finishes the

job.

And the human and the gaunt human are like backing away into

the counter area where the stew is bubbling up, and the ogre

falls to the ground with a heavy thud, and then there's a shout

from the room being.

All right.

SPEAKER_01: Actions.

Set my spear for a charge.

Chest bump.

Yeah, we chest bump.

SPEAKER_00: And then I set my spear for a change.

So you're setting your spear for a charge.

SPEAKER_03: I am going to stand right where I am, ready, brace

myself for attack.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

Edric.

Same.

SPEAKER_02: I offer Merrick some bread down in the hole.

Don't you like a slice of bread?

Hey.

Merrick.

SPEAKER_00: Are you hungry?

SPEAKER_02: Excellent.

SPEAKER_00: Bread?

I'm going to come out of the hole.

Ready my bow.

Okay.

Coming out of the hole, getting your bow ready to fire.

With a piece of bread in your mouth.

All right, initiative.

SPEAKER_02: I can dip it in the soup if you want.

SPEAKER_00: Go ahead, Doc.

SPEAKER_02: One.

Is it?

SPEAKER_00: Oh.

Here's a tie.

SPEAKER_01: Bastards.

Well, but if we are, if he's charging, which he'd have to do

to engage this round, we get to attack first, right?

You definitely would.

Right.

I get to do double damage.

SPEAKER_00: Because your weapon is longer.

SPEAKER_01: Right, but it's double damage that's important

for the spear setting for the charge.

SPEAKER_00: Right.

SPEAKER_01: But the I believe the rule was, and I can't

remember exactly where we talked about this before, right?

Where if you were charged, you get to make your attack first.

Yes.

If you have a longer weapon than the I don't even think that was

part of it.

But it's fine.

For me, it's irrelevant.

It's for him that I'm curious.

But anyway, here's my rule.

I got a really big long sword.

A 13, which will hit armor class two.

My spear is set for a charge, right?

So he's charging in.

He's really gung-ho.

SPEAKER_00: I haven't announced what the ogre has done yet.

He's charging me.

I'm already doing it.

That's 11 points of damage.

These dice haven't even decided what we're doing.

We've taken over.

SPEAKER_03: See what happens when we play DD when it's dark

out.

SPEAKER_01: It's terrible.

I was visualizing.

That's how you succeed at things.

You visualize them.

Is that how it works?

SPEAKER_00: Yes, it is how it works.

You see a you hear a couple of heavy footprints and you hear

the sound of a door being thrown open.

Guess he's leaving.

He's running away.

SPEAKER_02: He's running to get the rest.

SPEAKER_03: Shit.

SPEAKER_02: And you throw that in.

Next turn, actions.

SPEAKER_03: Charging after the dude.

So you're just into the room.

SPEAKER_00: Oh.

And you have your bow in hand along with a piece of bread from

your friend.

I didn't take any bread from.

Oh, you just left him hanging.

You did leave him hanging.

Poison, poison bread.

All right, Theorin.

I don't know what's in that stew.

The group's doing different things.

What are you doing?

SPEAKER_02: I'm following towards him and not attacking.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, where are you going?

SPEAKER_03: I'm the only one charging ahead like that.

He's going into the other the far room.

SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm gonna look around for a mug and see if

there's some ale.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

I can at least work with that.

Edric, what are you doing?

I am going through the door into the other room.

It's like you're charging after the He has to be stopped, or

where can you be stopped?

SPEAKER_02: While cheering them on.

Okay.

SPEAKER_01: Let everybody run away.

What am I doing?

What are you doing?

Trying to move to the door to get a shot at the retreating

ogre.

There you go.

SPEAKER_03: Didn't I just roll a one for initiative?

SPEAKER_01: Did you?

Was that this round?

That was last round.

Oh, last round.

It never happened.

He never came in for us to attack him.

He left.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_01: So this is another round.

Ignored and he left.

Okay.

So this is the next round where we burst into the paint row.

SPEAKER_00: We're doing the he runs, we run, ignored.

Right.

I made a morale check because he saw his buddy die.

And he ran.

And he bolted.

SPEAKER_03: Right.

What didn't count on him being such a Sally.

Either.

Sally.

Skirt wearing the Sally.

SPEAKER_00: The monsters don't just attack until they're dead.

SPEAKER_01: That should.

That's the ultimate insult to an ogre now.

He's being called a Sally.

So you wanted to attack next time.

You just yell out, Sally, flow down.

Anyway, what's the great room?

We're rushing into it.

What's we can see?

SPEAKER_00: What was your initiative role?

Short.

Oh, three.

Okay.

So you guys are going first.

Yes.

SPEAKER_03: Okay.

I'm sprinting.

SPEAKER_00: Are you charging?

Hell yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

So, Reyes, you you charge the ogre who's still, as you run in,

you see that he's he's got the door open and he's about to go

through.

I should tackle him.

SPEAKER_01: Right out the door in front of the ogre match.

He'd be pretty scared if I tackled his buddy right in front

of him.

SPEAKER_02: What do you?

SPEAKER_03: It's probably not gonna happen anyway.

So I was throwing out my sword with so this, yeah, this would

be.

SPEAKER_01: I think you need to invoke the grappling rules.

SPEAKER_03: I did not read up on the grappling rules enough to

feel safe doing that.

I did, but it's been a while.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: So maybe next time.

But there's grappling where you grab onto them.

There's also overbearing where you try to knock them over.

He's bigger.

Right now, that's not a good idea.

It's not an option.

SPEAKER_03: I do have a mechanics question, though.

Okay.

So the first round we Oh, I know what you're gonna get to.

Do I get two attacks this round since we are now on our third

initiative?

How does that that's a ruling, not a rule.

SPEAKER_00: Well, I don't think it is a ruling.

It's done by the round.

If you had been in combat, you would have only gotten one swing

last round.

So yes, you would get two attacks this round.

SPEAKER_03: Okay.

SPEAKER_01: That changes things.

No, he was gonna attack.

That changes what segment he acts on.

Changes how likely he is to be successful.

Okay.

SPEAKER_03: Yeah, correct.

SPEAKER_00: That's the well, I don't think it does change the

because you're charging on three.

So you could swing on three.

It doesn't change.

SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and then I'd swing at the end.

Right.

The end for my second attack.

SPEAKER_00: Correct.

He'd swing on three and ten.

SPEAKER_03: So charging is plus four to hit, right?

Two.

Plus two to hit.

No, three, sir.

Two.

Can I get a five?

SPEAKER_01: Two.

Shout that roll on five.

SPEAKER_03: That's gonna be a lot.

Negative five.

Okay, that definitely hits.

And what damage extra?

None.

None?

Yeah, plus three to hit.

Plus two to hit.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: That's good.

Charging should do extra damage, you think.

Fourteen.

Ten on the die roll.

Correct.

Good news.

Wow.

Ten on the die.

Fourteen.

Alright.

I am an ogre smasher today.

Right.

You're going to get the name Ogre Slayer from your herald

real soon.

All right.

The ogre smasher.

Edric or.

All right.

I didn't necessarily declare a charge.

I just said I was rushing into the room.

Oh, okay.

So are you getting into combat?

Well, so what I'm going to do, you said the ogre was opening

the door.

Correct.

He pulls in and he was pulling it in.

Right.

I'm going to run into that door and shoulder it closed because

he just got slashed, so he's probably not thinking I'm really

going to pull this door open very much anymore.

He just got 12, 14 points of damage.

So I'm just going to bash it, hit it closed.

Okay.

So he can't get out this round.

So then we get to murder him.

It's not really murder.

It's right.

SPEAKER_02: It's a very upfront thing for you to do.

It's right.

SPEAKER_01: It's kind of murder.

SPEAKER_02: It's almost front rank.

SPEAKER_00: Kind of murder.

It's righteous.

SPEAKER_03: It's not murder.

They're ogres.

SPEAKER_00: I don't think in this entire thing.

Dude, we already have.

SPEAKER_01: So it's okay.

We had this sword into them, but it's not okay to poison them.

Right, because you're standing right in front of them.

It's because he has the chance to fight back.

Right.

That's a good, like that's how the righteous fight.

Are you righteous?

I'm a righteous man.

Right, I am.

Okay.

SPEAKER_02: Speaking of righteous, I'm thinking of

poison.

But anyway, if I am able, I will attack him.

Are you charging?

Yeah, sure.

We don't have to be able to do it.

SPEAKER_00: I charge because you were already charged.

So I didn't run in the room.

Yeah.

You can get into combat if you'd like.

I could cast whole person on him, but he's not a person, he's

a monster.

SPEAKER_01: Doesn't matter.

SPEAKER_02: He's not too big.

He's meat humanoid.

No, he's not.

SPEAKER_01: He's too large.

Can't carry a get up.

Yeah, large.

He's large?

Yes.

Okay.

Then I will heal his wounds.

SPEAKER_02: Welcome to the advanced Southern Dragons.

I will just run into the room and then kill him next turn.

SPEAKER_01: All right.

1983 called.

SPEAKER_02: Could have just healed his wounds.

SPEAKER_00: And I forget what your action was.

SPEAKER_01: I was going to shoot.

Okay.

But they're now engaged in melee with him, right?

Yes.

SPEAKER_02: You can do it.

SPEAKER_01: So I will not shoot.

SPEAKER_02: Weak.

SPEAKER_01: Because in this rule set, I'm almost guaranteed to

hit them.

SPEAKER_00: You're not almost guaranteed.

You're guaranteed.

SPEAKER_01: There is a chance.

Always.

There's a very large chance.

SPEAKER_02: They get plenty of hit points.

SPEAKER_01: But you're very well, you're very good to hit.

So these are all you have to roll two hit, and then you're

able to see it.

SPEAKER_02: So I'm going to put the bow away, get the short

sword looking for an angle around behind it.

SPEAKER_00: Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02: As I cheer them on.

SPEAKER_00: There are some very large mugs here.

As well as like regular large ogre-sized mugs.

SPEAKER_01: They want to eat drink out of them, though.

Ogre size.

They stop their picking with as more in the mug than they

started with.

SPEAKER_00: You rush into the room and you put a shoulder into

the heavy door in, and with a loud crash, he's not a kid

anymore.

Closes closes back into place.

SPEAKER_01: Okay.

Boom.

Good idea.

It made noise though.

That's whatever.

SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but ogres make room.

Alright, next round.

Right, right.

Orcs.

Next round.

Edric.

Theorin.

Heading into the big room.

With a mug of coming in.

SPEAKER_02: Okay, you'll drink.

SPEAKER_01: I get my extra.

Put the ball away, pulling out the short sword, angling around

behind the ogre.

Okay, it's a lot.

You can do some of that.

SPEAKER_00: I'll be right there so I'm going to stab immediate

attack.

Okay, and you are in.

SPEAKER_03: I'm going to attack, continue attack, but I get my

second attack from that round.

Oh, that's true.

He went to second.

I can keep forgetting six.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

SPEAKER_01: All right, initiative will only hit AC6.

Four for initiative.

SPEAKER_00: And it is simultaneous.

SPEAKER_01: All right.

Now this similar to Doc's argument, this is like a new

combat essentially.

It's the same combat because this is my two attack rounds.

No.

Okay, we'll just do one.

SPEAKER_00: Your two attack rounds are synchronized.

We were just going to do it that way.

Yes.

Yeah, I'm going to do it that way because that's easy.

How you would do it.

SPEAKER_02: Okay.

That's fine.

You want to argue some more?

SPEAKER_03: You technically could have had a melee attack

after shutting the door.

SPEAKER_02: Is there a handle in your cycles or your action?

No, that was your action.

SPEAKER_01: Right.

I didn't charge, right.

That's my point, is I didn't charge last time.

But it's an action to shut the door.

Just accept that your cycles are in the I'm ready.

You guys are ganking a solitary ogre at fifth level.

No, we're no four.

I'm not complaining.

I just want to know.

It's otherwise it's we are rule sticklers.

SPEAKER_00: I believe the term is rules lawyering, which I

appreciate because I do it too.

I believe assholes the appropriate term.

Owls.

Alright.

Way four.

Very well.

SPEAKER_01: We did mention that we're grumpy rolls the more

nice.

Does the ogre?

Certainly the door opens.

And the dragon appears.

Ogre goes on four.

Okay, so we're simultaneous.

Yes.

Which you probably said already.

SPEAKER_00: Does it one, two, three go?

Or is it base comes back on a dragon?

Okay, so you wander into the room.

You wander into the room with some stew.

You are attacking, you are attacking.

SPEAKER_02: I'm for a drink.

You didn't get stew out of the house.

SPEAKER_00: Well, it would have required more time to tap.

And I didn't say there was beer in there.

I said there was stew and bread.

SPEAKER_02: Go, team, go.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

All of us attack.

Ready.

One, two, three.

I'm deciding who it attacks.

Oh.

One to two, three to four, five to six.

What is it?

SPEAKER_03: That's me.

SPEAKER_01: I can't say that three to four.

SPEAKER_00: All right.

Roll.

I already missed.

So did it.

By a lot.

Terrible.

What you witnessed is the most inevitable display fighting

ability.

SPEAKER_03: This was a defensive battle.

There were lots of near misses.

SPEAKER_01: We were reorienting parries.

Right.

Blocks.

Jockeying her position.

Right.

Feints.

Me closing the door through everything off.

Setting up for this round, which is a two-attack round.

Two attack round.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04: Well, what the hell was the thing?

SPEAKER_01: I realized I was going out of order.

It's my turn.

SPEAKER_00: Initiative, though.

You three, actually, the four of you are in combat because you

were able to get close enough to be in combat this time.

You have expressed no interest in being coming in.

I have to hold my spells back.

So you'll just walk in there.

Stu is amazing.

SPEAKER_03: There we go.

SPEAKER_01: Cup of noodle mage.

All right, initiative.

We are going on a walk.

SPEAKER_02: Woo! One door in.

SPEAKER_01: This is it.

He's gone.

He could be looking for bad guys or something.

All in the whiff.

SPEAKER_02: With that one door in, one door out.

SPEAKER_01: You're all gonna whiff.

Nobody said there was one door in or out.

Shut.

16.

Oh, that's not gonna whiff.

Alright, what was your initiative role?

One.

Okay, you're going.

It's our two attack ground anyway.

Yep.

So eight points of damage as a spear hits the ogre.

Okay.

SPEAKER_00: It I pushed.

It appears injured.

He's close to the phone.

SPEAKER_02: It appears very distressed.

SPEAKER_00: Alright.

Should we stop him?

SPEAKER_02: Should we stop him?

Distress.

Oh, you missed.

SPEAKER_00: Yes.

So did he?

SPEAKER_01: Oh.

You're on one.

SPEAKER_02: Why don't you just heal him and tell him?

Oh, as I attack him.

Distress, sure.

SPEAKER_01: I heal the That's definitely a hit.

SPEAKER_02: Good job.

SPEAKER_01: Which is AC0?

Yep.

Yeah.

Sweet.

D D8.

Oh, that's right.

SPEAKER_00: He's one point of damage?

SPEAKER_01: I can do two.

Yes.

It wasn't a backstab?

No.

You could have given him all the backstabs.

It would have been like, yeah, let him have it.

And then he only needed one point of damage.

He did like 12.

I could feel real good about himself.

SPEAKER_02: So the moment he's down, loot his body.

Do we hear steps, people crowding down the hallway?

Yeah, we hear that.

SPEAKER_00: We hear the heavy thud of the ogre hit the

flagstones.

And then there's silence.

There's some soft whimpering of the two in the kitchen.

SPEAKER_02: God, you gotta try this soup.

It's amazing.

SPEAKER_01: And the slurping of uh all right, now if we dress up

like ogres, right, maybe we should skin the ogre and maybe

take wear it.

SPEAKER_00: But you don't hear anything.

SPEAKER_01: America's gonna wear the spider, and you two wear the

ogres.

So is there another door out of this room besides the door that

ogre was trying to go out of?

SPEAKER_00: No.

Similar to the kitchen room, this room has like seven-inch

long pointed slats for air circuit for air circulation and

to let some light in.

Okay.

Is this the room they eat in?

Torches on the walls is a big long table evidence that the

ogres use this room to eat.

There's some food on the table.

SPEAKER_02: We could wait for them all to go.

SPEAKER_01: Ring a dinner bell.

God, it's a great idea.

The cafeteria.

SPEAKER_03: Is there any obvious gigantic treasure chest?

SPEAKER_01: No.

In the kitchen.

Right.

That's where I would put it.

Where are the desserts?

There are no desserts.

We were the dessert.

Sweet bread.

SPEAKER_02: They don't like sugar.

SPEAKER_01: Hey, a nin Nin?

Isn't that brains?

SPEAKER_02: Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: What's the human's name?

Dard?

Hey Nin Dard.

Hey, what?

Where's this door go?

Does it go out into the hallway?

Like, where's the slaves?

SPEAKER_00: It goes into the there's the front gate and the

back gate.

And then there's a door beyond that goes into the to the

courtyard.

SPEAKER_01: The courtyard.

Is that like the garden area out front?

Or inside courtyard in the between the towers.

Oh, okay.

So it's outside.

Oh, exposed to the air.

SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it is walled.

SPEAKER_01: Okay, cool.

That could be our hat to set up an escape route through there.

But did I get the answer on where your slave friends are,

where the rest of you are?

SPEAKER_00: They're near Mosaic.

They keep them penned up in a room by the ledge.

SPEAKER_01: Right, where people get thrown off.

Okay.

Well Which direction is that from here?

We gotta go out this way through the courtyard, and it's on the

other side by the other tower, right?

Because and that's open to the air, right?

We we saw his feet.

You saw his feet that day.

So we know that we can't.

SPEAKER_00: Well you know the you're in the other end of the

end of the building from where that was.

But that wall of his room was gone, right?

Right, in in right in that particular spot.

SPEAKER_01: Okay.

Right.

We're not in the smashed in half.

Right.

A Nim or Tarp.

Where's the is there any more ogres in this section of the

manor?

All right.

How many?

For those in podcast land, the Jim is shaking his head

vigorously, yes, in a slack jawed manner.

SPEAKER_00: They come and go all the time.

They they're guards, they're up on the towers.

How many of them usually come in here at a time?

A couple, but that that door, they I'm sure somebody heard

that door.

SPEAKER_01: So it's just a door closing.

So we can do to them guys.

They know their friends are down here.

So we drag the ogres back, stuff them in the hole.

SPEAKER_02: We gotta do that.

SPEAKER_00: Oh we need to bump them in the hole?

Yeah.

And then just wait in the kitchen behind them in the

kitchen.

You're all pretty sure that they're not gonna go through

that hole.

Yeah, not in one piece.

SPEAKER_01: You're assuming that we leave them in one piece.

There's kitchen utensils here.

We don't have that kind of time.

SPEAKER_02: We asked Nim if he could.

SPEAKER_01: I have a long sword.

SPEAKER_00: But you hear here we go.

You hear what steps.

There they come.

All right.

SPEAKER_01: Is this a wooden table?

Like looking for the boys.

And it's got benches or whatever.

Hey, let me drag this guy under the table.

Okay.

At least make it not super, super obvious.

All right.

Put a blanket on him.

If there's anything like that with lapsacks.

Just position him like he's drunk.

All of the blood on the floor makes that very much.

SPEAKER_00: Dump some soup on it.

Soup, yeah, there we go.

Yeah, still the soup and it's a little bit.

And now there's a bloody smear of soup.

SPEAKER_02: With my cupway next to it.

I mean, it looks like wine, right?

We try so hard.

SPEAKER_00: Why not?

SPEAKER_02: I know.

SPEAKER_00: Alright, but you drag the ogre underneath the

table.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah.

Well, one of them, there's still another one.

He's in the back kitchen, though.

We can drag him to the kitchen, and he'll be out of view.

Like, look, what are we gonna do?

Set up for another ambush.

Yeah, exactly.

All right, let's set up a set up another ambush.

Might be just one.

The door opens in, right?

It does, yeah.

Right.

So otherwise your thing wouldn't have worked.

Right.

It would have been pretty terrible.

Yeah, you would have just flown right through the door.

That would have been hilarious.

Yeah.

I would have kept my footing a sweater.

A nimble elf.

Nope.

Not.

Just sliding out like this character socks.

This character is very average.

It's all right.

Captain Mediocre.

SPEAKER_03: Yes, let's get into spring trap positions.

You probably hide behind something with your bow on a

different angle.

I'm going to stand up by the door in the front, off the side

of the door just a little bit.

SPEAKER_01: Does this seem like a pretty good time for you to

get buffed?

Engor for one ogre?

Yeah, I don't think so.

SPEAKER_03: Well, the road makes last 40 minutes.

Well, odds are we're probably going to run into something

within the next 40 minutes.

So a whole bunch of something.

That's an extra D40.

SPEAKER_01: No, let's wait.

Yeah, let's wait on that.

Let's wait.

Yeah.

Gonna stand there like 15 feet inside the door with a bowl.

SPEAKER_02: Can I have more, sir?

SPEAKER_01: There you go.

That's a great idea.

SPEAKER_02: More.

SPEAKER_01: So yeah, basically the door is the kill zone.

Yeah.

I'm going to position myself in the in the corner, like if the

door, if the room is the along, like if it's the Osric landscape

up here, right?

Yes, sir.

The door opens in.

Get behind the door, let them come in and then push the door

closed and block it.

Well, here's what I thought.

I thought the halfling might get behind the door.

That way, when they come in the door, then he would be stabbing

them in the back.

But I didn't want to tell him how to do his job.

I was thinking artillery covered with an angle that he's not

shooting at us.

They seem way more concerned with what I'm doing than we do.

Because you're the big gun right now.

I am not the big gun.

The big gun is awesome.

Tharding them are like looking back and forth.

That's true.

I killed the last two things we encountered, didn't I?

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, they're going to be at the door before we go.

SPEAKER_01: I go get in the corner on the same side as the

door.

No, I'm standing here jerking off when the ogre walks in.

Like if it opens, I want to be on the corner that the door

doesn't open to, right?

Fucking I go for some stew.

Okay.

Okay.

We lost two.

I'm kidding.

Thinking about it.

Bring him some stew.

Well, his stew is on the floor.

Yeah.

No, it's fine.

Now it's a slippery spot for the ogres.

I would like to can I hang an and stew on the order one from

Acme.

SPEAKER_02: It should arrive in time.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah, probably two weeks.

It will be no man, that's next day.

Amazon got that shit local.

The door the ogres are trying to come into, right?

Yeah.

It opens in towards the sea.

Correct.

I would like to go into the upper left-hand corner here by

the dragon wing.

That way when the door comes in.

I shoot them.

That's where I'm going to be.

So you're there in the corner.

SPEAKER_03: I'm by the way the door opens behind the door.

All right then.

SPEAKER_02: If I can also be somewhere where the door shields

my presence, definitely not.

I'll do that.

If not, I will go back into the kitchen behind the door.

SPEAKER_03: Maybe you should call in the Lord of trigonometry

to bless this fight.

SPEAKER_02: No more heels.

SPEAKER_03: If we had luck with ribs, I'd give you one for that

one.

SPEAKER_00: Oh, you fucking list.

Well, now you're ruined.

I thought you were trying to came up with that.

SPEAKER_03: No, dude, I'm not that clever.

I would have stopped at like three.

SPEAKER_02: Sticking with tri-s.

SPEAKER_00: Three tri words.

Trigonometry, Edric.

SPEAKER_02: Priest of my priest of math.

SPEAKER_01: Your priest of trilogy.

So does everybody have like a position like that?

Isn't it like a brain worm or some shit?

Trigonosis.

Trigonosis.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02: No, it's the pig's kid.

It's a worm.

Pig's kid.

Yeah, brain worm.

I don't know if it's in the meat.

You can get it if you don't.

SPEAKER_03: But anyway, back to the point.

We're set in ambush.

SPEAKER_02: Let's do it.

We're all set.

Okay.

Silence.

SPEAKER_00: Did I end up in the kitchen?

You are in the kitchen.

Cool.

SPEAKER_02: We are waiting for some soup while you're in there.

SPEAKER_00: We are waiting for the ogre to open our door.

SPEAKER_02: You don't have to use rations.

SPEAKER_01: Oh God.

SPEAKER_02: Don't look things up.

Every time we'll go over there, he's on his tablet.

SPEAKER_01: Digestive juices release larva into the small

intestine.

Yeah.

Okay.

Where they grow into adult worms, mate, and reproduce new

larvae that travel through the blood to muscle tissue.

Yeah, that's in the stew, by the way.

That's in the street.

This is on you.

Yes, it is.

SPEAKER_00: This is on you, DM.

In the stew.

Oh, the trichinosis?

Yes.

It's not good.

SPEAKER_02: Raw pork is bad.

SPEAKER_00: Yeah.

Not as bad as the beef you'll get in the United States right

now, but.

But anyway, you're you're discussing food safety.

We're in a kitchen.

We're fighting in a kitchen.

As we wait to murder Nim and ambush honor.

Because halflings know their food safety.

They've all taken the course.

SPEAKER_02: No trichinosis.

SPEAKER_00: Could have just gone with my potion idea.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I could have.

SPEAKER_01: Just saying.

But you've got to got two of them.

SPEAKER_02: See what would have happened.

SPEAKER_01: I was going to do the potion to levitate in the

stew and then just float around.

SPEAKER_03: Outside the door, you would hear the stew on the

hot stew on Lake Conan.

SPEAKER_00: Activity of some sort.

You hear like things being slid.

Oh, they're preparing for a siege against us.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: They're preparing their ambush.

SPEAKER_02: Why would a door slam?

SPEAKER_03: I thought they would be opening the doors and closing

them, seeing perhaps where the commotion came from.

SPEAKER_00: Outside the great room that you're in, you hear

the howling of wolves.

SPEAKER_03: Well, this just got all kinds of terrible.

SPEAKER_00: And beyond the door, you hear like a shrill We got

him in there, boys.

Well, that worked out.

SPEAKER_02: Didn't it?

We got him to come to us.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: Oh, is that the goddamn imp?

No, you've heard this before.

You believe that is Mozic.

Oh.

The hill giant.

So now we go back down the hole, out through the root cellar, and

hit him from behind.

SPEAKER_02: How do they know we're here?

SPEAKER_01: We were silent.

No, we weren't.

We were completely silent.

SPEAKER_02: No, there was a battle.

We killed two things.

SPEAKER_01: We were definitely talking while in this room while

they could have been out there listening.

Listening.

Honestly, your plan isn't.

That's not bad.

Let's get that door block closed hard.

And then we'll let the halfling taught them.

Talk about their mothers, call them Sally's.

Whatever it is that halflings do to insult people.

Sally.

Tell them we killed his brother.

We already got one.

Okay.

So do you want to do that?

We want to shuffle out of here quick.

Yeah.

Or we want to fight these guys right here.

Well, hold on.

SPEAKER_02: They gotta get next.

SPEAKER_01: I know you're gonna say yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_03: No, you don't.

Okay.

Hear it.

Let's hear it.

Go.

Is the front door fucking open?

What door?

If we run around outside, we come around to a locked door and

we're standing there.

SPEAKER_01: We got a half link.

Plus, we know that you get in here at all.

Mosic's bedroom.

We know there's a salt out of the air.

SPEAKER_03: He needs to be two plots at one time.

That's what we need you to do.

I need to be two people.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: So how are we gonna get in if it's shut at the front

door?

We'll go in through Mosic's open exposed bedroom.

Oh, that's right.

Yeah, he's his thing's just blown open.

Now the wolves are out there, so we gotta worry about that.

But we got sleep because Sterin still hasn't used it, right?

Is Sterin even with us?

And remember, he's eating poisonous stew.

I've been carrying it around this sack of goddamn cow meat.

That ranks in cows.

I know, dude.

It freaking stinks.

Let's go.

This last episode.

Two episodes ago.

How did the halfling cook it?

So maybe we can use that to distract the wolves.

Maybe they're well trained.

SPEAKER_02: The salted pork?

SPEAKER_01: No, the cow meat that I brought.

I'm like literally said I put cow meat in a sack and I've been

carrying ball meat with me all day long for these wolves.

Oh gross.

All right.

Stay and fight or leave.

SPEAKER_02: Stand and fight.

I'm bottlenecked.

They're not going to be able to come in more than one at a time.

SPEAKER_01: Alright.

Use your judgment.

Would a fireball fill that room up?

SPEAKER_02: I don't know.

I haven't seen outside the door.

SPEAKER_01: You haven't been into the main hall yet.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yes.

Well no, I'm standing in the main hall and you guys are all

standing right at the door.

unknown: Okay.

SPEAKER_02: I guess I can I launch fireball at the door.

Not right now.

Okay.

unknown: Okay.

SPEAKER_00: I'm glad I'm gonna do it.

So what are we going to play next time?

I can't though.

You did say I was deliberately misunderstanding this or not.

SPEAKER_01: We go back into the kitchen and when they open the

door into the main hall, that's when you fireball.

Just fireball as soon as they open the door and start coming

in.

So I'm asking how big the room is.

I was asking you, but I could have asked the G.

SPEAKER_00: So you are asking how big the room is.

SPEAKER_01: I am, but I thought maybe the Major was going to

cast the fireball, might want to ask.

So I tried to help him.

He doesn't care.

I want to know.

He has to stew.

He's happy.

Leave him alone.

SPEAKER_00: He's the uh I didn't have to waste a ration today.

The room is 60 feet in length and 40 feet wide.

So it'll fill the whole room.

And it's about 20 feet tall.

It's a big open air room.

SPEAKER_02: We have to watch for Grosik to come in because he's

the main one we want to get.

SPEAKER_01: We want to try to catch as many as we can.

All right, look.

Block that door.

Right?

We already kind of said we did that.

Back into the kitchen.

We build a barricade to stop the excess blast from the fireball,

right?

If there's a table, kitchen tables, we throw them in front

of the way.

We'll build our own barricades from this side.

And then when you cast fireball, we'll have a little cover.

You might not kill them all, but we'll stand back here and launch

arrows at them and then see what happens.

What the hell?

It's that or leave and go back through with Merrick down the

hole.

SPEAKER_02: I'm all for fireball.

Point me in a direction.

SPEAKER_01: We could do both.

We could still fireball and just fireball and run down.

Fireball and just leave.

Right?

Talk about stirring the hornet's nest.

Should end well.

SPEAKER_02: The appropriate thing.

Fireball and run.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah, fireball and run.

So when one ogre comes through the door with some wolves.

We wait.

unknown: Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: Wait until we see the whites in our eyes.

Right.

We can shoot our way past the ogre and a couple of wolves.

Yeah, wait until a ghost that gets in there.

With four, two or three or four ogres.

SPEAKER_03: As many as possible.

Right.

SPEAKER_02: What could possibly go wrong?

SPEAKER_01: Make sure the good point.

Make sure they're all invested.

Before we do that, does anybody want to loot that ogre?

SPEAKER_00: Ogre loot.

I should shoe ogre loot.

Alright, the ogre has 11 gold on him and a and a medium-sized

amethyst.

These guys are gonna pick up.

The wolves, and you're like seeing like torchlight play

through the slats in the walls.

Like they're moving around outside.

Are these walls wood?

And just gonna light the whole place on fire, bro.

It's their house.

Let them.

And you just hear them sliding things up against the door.

Wait, didn't they have some sort of explosive?

SPEAKER_01: I don't know, but we gotta get out if we're gonna get

out.

Yeah, now.

They're sliding shit up against the door.

SPEAKER_02: I'm leaving.

SPEAKER_01: I'm down the hole.

SPEAKER_00: I'm down the hole.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, they're blocking us in for some reason,

so.

SPEAKER_00: Yes.

Oh, so you all go down Nim and We drag them along.

Yeah, they pop down the hole with you, and you're in that

that tunnel underneath the spider layer.

The earth.

And go to the edge where the opening is.

And you're you make your way all the way back out to where the

door is ever so slightly leaning against the lung with some

pieces of cask.

SPEAKER_03: Well.

Take a look at the door, see if anybody's there.

If they're smart, they would.

Right.

Listen.

SPEAKER_01: Isn't that a thing that thieves can do?

SPEAKER_03: I think thieves are.

SPEAKER_01: What are you grabbing on to?

The handle.

Oh my god, you don't need it for making sure it's latched.

SPEAKER_02: There was no latch in the bottom.

SPEAKER_01: Can we lock it on the bottom?

Just it's just the wooden pieces.

Just for the record, this wasn't me.

SPEAKER_00: I know.

All right.

This time.

I'm laughing at it, but it wasn't.

Okay, so you're at the end of the of the tunnel there?

We're listening.

From time to hear, time to hear.

There's wolves out there.

There's wolves in the middle.

SPEAKER_01: And then it goes away.

Now would be time for your meat.

All right.

I know what you're saying, Doc.

I think.

Can I get that as a just a that sound bite?

June is a bug as a ringtone for Doc.

Now is the time for the time for your meat.

SPEAKER_05: Now is the time for your meat.

SPEAKER_01: Just if there's an intro, that's it.

That's it.

Nothing else.

Now it's a time for your beat.

Brilliant!

SPEAKER_03: If ever there was a time for that's what she said,

Joe.

SPEAKER_01: So what I'm gonna need you to do.

It didn't even need that.

SPEAKER_02: Meat time.

SPEAKER_01: It's open that door and you're gonna stuff your meat

in there.

I'm gonna chuck my meat out the opening.

Your sack.

Yeah, I'm gonna chuck the meat out of the phone.

I'm gonna throw it.

SPEAKER_00: The meat sack.

Yep.

All right.

So you push down the Well, but you open however, whatever he's

gotta do.

The door was destroyed.

It was just sort of is there a handle on this side?

There is a handle, but there's no hinge anymore.

There's no handle on this side.

SPEAKER_05: We can't open it.

I don't know what to do.

SPEAKER_01: Whatever it takes to chuck it out.

I just don't want the whole door to just be like laying there.

We're not pushing it over.

SPEAKER_00: And you hurl a bundle of meat out into the

night.

Yes.

I will have not thinking I was going to utter those words on my

bingo card.

SPEAKER_02: Hold Theron back.

SPEAKER_00: And watch us as sack sails into the darkness.

SPEAKER_02: Oh, I have my suit.

SPEAKER_00: You hear barks, howls, and you see gray shapes.

They know we're here now.

Headed down towards the several gray shapes.

You can see them flitting through the night and heading

towards the meat.

Now what are you doing?

Do something.

What's part B of this plan?

Wizard.

SPEAKER_01: Wizard.

Do something to the wolves that are going to eat the meat.

You still have sleep, right?

I don't think sleep works on.

Have you tried?

SPEAKER_02: It says humanoids.

SPEAKER_01: Oh, does it?

Humanoids.

SPEAKER_02: Sleep?

SPEAKER_01: Does it work on wolves?

No.

SPEAKER_02: I'm pretty sure it says humanoids.

SPEAKER_00: You have my player's book.

I couldn't get it.

The landscape studum with bows.

SPEAKER_01: When that happens.

Sleep?

Why?

It won't work.

SPEAKER_00: Oh, I actually A number of creatures.

Creatures.

SPEAKER_03: Creatures.

Woohoo!

SPEAKER_00: There we go.

All right, don't keep reading it.

Are you casting sleep or are you not casting sleep?

SPEAKER_02: If they want me to cast sleep, I'll throw it out

there.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you're casting sleep.

Yes.

Okay, now what does it say?

All right.

SPEAKER_01: So we don't know the number of hit dice of the

creatures.

The range is 30 feet plus 10 feet of level, so 80 feet for

him.

There's no way I chucked the meat that far, of course.

No, you're you don't have the biceps for that.

No.

So if the creatures, every every one hit die or less creature in

the radius is hit 44 of those.

One to two is two D4, two to three hit dice is one D4, three

to four is one D two, and four point one to four point plus

four creature.

SPEAKER_00: So 4.1 to 4.4 is 1D2 minus 1.

Right.

SPEAKER_01: So if you roll a 4-5 or 6, you get one of them.

Right?

If you don't, you get a 50-50 shot of getting one.

That's weird.

SPEAKER_02: Alright, roll me a D4.

50-50 of getting these things.

SPEAKER_01: Get one of them.

SPEAKER_02: At least.

Get them all.

Just roll them all for.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

A wolf falls asleep.

SPEAKER_02: Yay.

We win.

SPEAKER_00: Man, either someone's.

Let's see how they deal with that.

They eat the sleep.

They attack it and tear it to shreds.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00: Maybe he'll eat his buddy.

SPEAKER_02: Just like raptors.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

They seem intent on this meat.

Can't you blame him?

You hear some like shouts.

Maybe we should kill the other wolves.

SPEAKER_01: We might need to rush out right now.

There's three wolves.

Oh.

Three walking wolves.

There was four in total.

Oh.

Oh, I thought there were two.

SPEAKER_02: I sleep only working on the water.

Misjudged this.

So that tells you.

SPEAKER_01: That tells you that these wolves actually are

dynamite.

It wouldn't be a bad idea to just blast the shit out of them

with a fireball.

That's what I'm hearing.

Are they grouped up?

SPEAKER_03: Yes, they are.

Right around the meat.

Yeah, dude, you are not going to have a better chance.

All right.

SPEAKER_02: Give them the meat and we just sneak off.

SPEAKER_01: Are you seriously suggesting you use a fireball on

three wolves?

SPEAKER_02: Yes.

That's what I'm saying.

No, I want to hold that.

SPEAKER_00: All right.

Actions.

All right.

Right now, Reyes, what are you doing?

You're you the wolves are intent on devouring some meat.

They're starting to fight over it a little bit.

Rush, go.

Just run by him.

Just run by him.

I'm going to go charge out there.

Okay, so you're charging out of the night, turning right or

left?

Left.

Okay.

SPEAKER_02: I also running out and turning left.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

We're running away.

SPEAKER_02: We're all running to the left.

I follow Rayus always.

Do it.

Go to the right.

Do it.

SPEAKER_01: I'm going to the left.

Okay.

And I'm going to disappear into the shadows.

SPEAKER_00: He's hiding.

Okay, so you're separating yourself from the group.

Yes, I'm becoming less of a target.

Okay.

SPEAKER_02: Put continual light on him.

Because there's an ogre mage up there who probably has fireball

too.

There's no ogre mage here.

SPEAKER_00: No, he's away.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02: One minute.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you bolt out of the out of out of the

tunnel, turning to the left, and running up a little bit of a

rise.

You can see the manor house, the the shadows of which rising up

on your left.

So you appear to be heading out towards towards the front of the

man of the manor house.

The front, the side didn't have the garden.

You well, you guys lose sight of your friend, of your small

diminutive friend.

What about Wilson?

As he slips into the in the into the night.

Is Wilbur still here?

That dude gets too much every time.

Whitmore.

The three of you are booking through.

Whitmore is behind you as well.

I keep I did completely forget about Whitmore.

That's fine.

But he's with you.

Along with and since he lied to us.

SPEAKER_01: Stokely.

Stokely.

SPEAKER_00: Yeah, him.

Stokum's.

And you you run and you find yourself crossing the like top

of the road.

And down, you you see nothing but there, there's like some

vegetation ahead, and then it slopes down away from you.

SPEAKER_01: So we'd end up on the we could end up on the far

side of the room.

SPEAKER_00: Behind you, you hear wolves feasting and snarling at

each other.

SPEAKER_01: Alright, we gotta get back in this manor house

somehow, right?

If we're or are we done?

We didn't win.

unknown: No.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so next round, Reyes.

SPEAKER_03: I'm continuing I'm gonna continue on up around

towards the manor house.

You said there was brush around it, or like vegetation.

Yeah.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: So you you're angling a little bit more to the

left then.

Correct.

To circle around.

SPEAKER_03: My main goal is to get into the front of the manor

house.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

SPEAKER_03: Or any door.

Or any door, really, yeah.

Any entrance way that I can.

SPEAKER_00: All right.

And I take it you guys you two are following.

I'm following.

Merrick, you've broken away and you're hidden in the in in the

in the night.

I'm gonna circle around to see if I can get a view of what they

were sliding up like what they were doing.

Okay.

So you're following in the same direction as them, but staying

hidden, or are you going a different direction?

If you keep going straight from the way that you guys had

turned, you're gonna be going down the hill and away from the

manor.

No, I'm not going away from the manor.

So are you continuing to go off to the left like these guys are,

or are you circling back to the right?

Doubling back and trying to get a good view of the room.

To the right or to the left?

To the right.

Okay, so you're circling back around to the right.

Okay.

Let's do some things here.

Alright, the wolves are continuing to fight over this

meat.

SPEAKER_01: Man, I'm so glad I carried that all day.

And you didn't poison.

SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we didn't poison the needle.

SPEAKER_01: Poisoning the honorable.

Uh it's always honorable if they're sentient creatures.

All right, Reyes.

SPEAKER_00: Yes, you you circle around and you can see as you

circle around towards the front of the building, there's a like

a large, like squarish block structure that's about 25 feet

high.

In sort of the center of the building, you can see a large.

Gate door opening on the front.

It's it comes to a point, large oak doors.

There seems to be some faded heraldry and things on it.

But you would see this as like the front door of the entire

manor.

Gotcha.

To the right of that is a stone block wall.

There are parapets up upon the top.

And right above, just to the right, and near that main door

are is a is a big tower.

And there are there is torchlight up at the top of it

and some ogres.

That sucks.

So Merrick, you manage to get around to the right and you

circle back around the fighting wolves, and you don't attract

their attention.

You're moving fast and you're being very stealthy.

And you you find yourself coming back up to where the road is.

And up the road you see marching a blue-skinned ogre and three

other ogres.

Great.

Marching.

Which way?

They're about a hundred yards away there, so they're not real

close, but you can definitely see them in the moonlight.

Coming towards us?

With your marching up the road.

SPEAKER_02: He wasn't the ogre, but I think he's working with

the ogre.

SPEAKER_00: Whitmore?

SPEAKER_02: Whitmore.

They know they seem to know we did this, or we're going to do

this.

SPEAKER_01: What was the obvious thing?

It's been here the whole time, though.

SPEAKER_00: Oh, and the other thing you see, because you can

see the other tower that you saw before, and there's a very

bright bonfire burning on a beacon.

SPEAKER_03: So they let everybody know where he was.

SPEAKER_01: The night of flyers.

I think this might be a time to slink away in the dark.

We can't slink away in the dark.

We didn't fireball the wolves that will chase us through the

night.

SPEAKER_02: They're having a snack.

They're good.

SPEAKER_01: Well, let's get moving, because the last thing I

knew that wolves had a very good sense of smell.

He says smugly.

Well, let's go.

We got to move.

Apparently we're on the run.

We got to get to our horses.

Hopefully they're there.

If we get to our horses, maybe we got a chance of living.

But otherwise, what are we going to do about all this?

You got a plan?

You're not even there.

You guys got to do that.

We don't even hold up.

We don't even know this is going on.

Look, I'm not worried about him.

Right, yeah.

You would have no idea.

We don't know blue guys.

Well, what are we going to do?

Go in?

Go in.

How?

Yeah, the fucking front door.

Is it right here?

It's right here.

Is it locked?

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02: We don't know.

SPEAKER_00: Let's go check.

I'm pretty sure I can kick it open.

SPEAKER_02: To the door.

SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you're just running full on towards the

door?

SPEAKER_02: Right through it.

SPEAKER_00: Is it open?

Is it unlocked?

SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm gonna go up and I'm not Kool-Aid man in

it.

I'm gonna go check the door first.

I'm gonna give him the whistle.

SPEAKER_02: Oh, great.

What does that mean?

SPEAKER_01: The signal whistle that the scouts use.

Okay.

Yeah, but we'll know he's out there somewhere.

SPEAKER_00: I definitely think that he's signaling Whitmore.

Why does he need Whitmore?

Let's see what he needs, dude.

Yeah, I Okay.

So you make the whistle.

Reyes, you check the door.

You head up to the door with the rest of your party behind you.

The door is not locked.

You feel if you give it a good shove, you could open it.

SPEAKER_03: Gangbusters.

Let's go in.

SPEAKER_01: You want to be big?

Because well.

All right.

I enlarge.

Time for subtlety is gone.

Gone.

Yeah.

Like an hour ago.

SPEAKER_04: Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: All right.

So yes, I cast enlarge upon Reyes.

Okay.

What did we say that is D4 damage extra?

I don't know.

You got the book.

At least a D20.

Oh, you mean what's the book say?

Well, we can make it up.

I thought we were.

Oh, okay.

Well, uh, you got 25 strength.

Here, let me give you the D30.

That part it does not do.

Enlarge, right?

Yeah.

So it gives it essentially it gives you a strength of 18 and

increases your size by 80%.

So you're 10 feet tall or 11.

You're ogre sized.

Right.

Everything gets larger.

It doesn't say anything about strength except it goes up to

18.

SPEAKER_00: Everything?

Eh?

SPEAKER_01: Everything?

unknown: Right.

SPEAKER_00: Everything but one thing gets larger.

Yes.

SPEAKER_01: That makes me.

So you'll get an extra you'll get a plus one to hit and a plus

one to damage.

No, it's plus three for 18, isn't it?

No.

SPEAKER_03: I'm forgetting.

Because there's exceptional strength in this game.

SPEAKER_01: So you're not getting exceptional strength.

You're just getting 18 strength.

So you're plus one, plus two.

So what's your strength now?

16.

So you'll get an extra plus one to hit, an extra one to damage.

I just wanted to make sure my own.

So GM says you can get a little more based on just being bigger,

but obviously you're just bigger and tougher, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_00: Well, wait, the You're using an Large.

Well, okay.

SPEAKER_01: Right, right.

But it doesn't say it gives him extra damage other than it

increases strength.

Which does increase my damage.

Right, but not in uh D4 kind of way.

Nope.

That's I think the hill giant strength says that.

Not in a D4 kind of way.

Not in a way.

Right.

Because that was a potion or something.

Yeah, the potion, yeah.

So I cast the spell, it lasts 40 minutes.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

SPEAKER_01: And then he breaks the door down.

SPEAKER_00: And Reyes grows in stature.

I'm super low.

Once again, gleaming chain mail.

In a D4 kind of way.

And Reyes is now a very well-armored ogre.

Slightly smarter.

I have a bigger brain.

And you bust the door straight open.

Straight ahead of you.

There's a like a long head of you stacking many any sort of

wooden or other item up against the doorway on the left is two

ogres and shouting instruction behind him is Mozic, the hill

giant.

Take him down.

SPEAKER_03: I'm going to specifically call out Mozag.

I'm going to call him small.

SPEAKER_02: You just launch fireball at him.

SPEAKER_01: Role play.

Let's hear it.

Come on.

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03: You're small, Mozig.

SPEAKER_01: Oh, come on.

SPEAKER_03: Put some energy into it.

Give him a big voice.

It is too late to do this.

SPEAKER_00: I'm calling you out.

SPEAKER_03: Yeah.

I'm I'm but see, I had to do that for you.

You're old.

SPEAKER_01: That sounds that sounded exactly how I wanted it

to.

There's just one problem with this very tiny hallway space.

The overblast from the fireball.

SPEAKER_00: Well, it's about a hundred feet long.

unknown: Do it.

SPEAKER_00: I think fireball would be made off.

It's about a hundred feet long.

So actions for this round.

The the the big door is, and there's more room for more than

just you in the entryway, so you guys could shoot around or

whatever you want.

So actions for this round.

SPEAKER_05: Cool cool, cool.

SPEAKER_00: I'll shoot down the thing, making sure that I have

great cover from the fireball.

SPEAKER_01: That is inevitable.

And your target is I'm going to target the giant.

Okay.

SPEAKER_03: I am going to taunt the giant and take a step into

the room.

You're going to taunt him.

Okay.

SPEAKER_00: Edric.

SPEAKER_02: I'm going to wait to see if battle ensues.

I'm going to just hang out and see if you thought you would.

SPEAKER_00: Do you think the chances are likely?

SPEAKER_02: I don't know.

SPEAKER_00: I think he means close combat.

SPEAKER_02: I'm not going to run up to him and hit him this time.

SPEAKER_00: No, I okay.

Magic eight ball says.

SPEAKER_02: Let's hold that back.

unknown: All right.

SPEAKER_00: If he would have attacked, but he's evolving.

I'm not attacking him because I knew that was going to happen.

Where are you aiming the fireball?

SPEAKER_02: A giant.

Between his legs.

SPEAKER_00: At the giant.

So he's about 60 feet down the corridor.

Okay.

What's the particulars?

Of what?

Fireball?

Fireball.

He goes boom.

SPEAKER_01: Yeah, here.

Why don't I just hand you their book back?

All right.

Jogging it like once I got my hand on that landscape version.

We were doing such a good job of selling this.

We only had one scale.

Make my way into my bag on the window.

All right.

Keep yours.

This spell creates a massive explosion of magical fire at the

targeted point.

The fireball detonates with a low roar, causing 1D6 points of

fire damage per caster's magic level to all creatures within an

area of effect.

Creatures making successful saving throws suffer only half

the indicated damage.

When you cast a spell, a bead of light streaks from your pointed

finger to the target area, and if it strikes another object

directly in its path, the fireball will detonate

immediately.

The blast fills the entire volume of the spell radius, and

if it is cast into an enclosed area smaller than the area of

effect, the flames will expand from this area until the spell's

full volume has been reached.

The volume of a 20-foot radius sphere is approximately 33,500

cubic feet, and there are 1,000 cubic feet in a 10x10 area.

So in an area with a 10-foot ceiling, the fireball will fill

approximately 33 10 by 10 foot squares.

If a fireball explodes in the middle of a corridor, 10 feet

wide and 10 feet high, the blast will extend a staggering feet.

Let's watch them get shot out of the hallway direction.

SPEAKER_00: Okay.

So kaboom.

The saving grace on this is going to be this is basically a

20-foot wide in terms of and 20 foot high.

SPEAKER_01: And how tall?

SPEAKER_00: It's actually open.

SPEAKER_01: Oh sweet.

This is the courtyard.

SPEAKER_00: So it's like there's like walls on either end, and

there's a and looks like there's murder holes and all sorts of

stuff that you can kill to defend this.

That we just walked into.

Yes.

That maybe you need to worry about, right?

Well, they're gonna get away.

Well, maybe we go in.

But there is room for this to expand to the vertical.

So the entire corridor, which you're not in, is 20 10 foot by

10 foot squares, which is 200.

Even if this was 20 feet high, it would be contained within the

corridor.

SPEAKER_01: Right.

SPEAKER_00: So this is going to fill up like 80% of the corridor

and go a lot of the energy is going to go up.

SPEAKER_01: And can we please have it blow all of the doors

away?

Because that just seems like something so appropriate.

I want all the doors to be blasted off their hinges.

Right?

Come on.

Let's make a savings throw for each door.

I'd buy that.

Why not?

It's a good idea.

He's going to hand wave it.

And one thing's for sure about it.

Okay, when that's all done, it's all wooden, right?

SPEAKER_00: So a golden streak of light flies from your

outstretched hand as you, with a pinch of bat guano and some

sulfur, direct this 60 feet down the corridor.

It explodes in a massive fireball.

Roll me your damage.

We cheer like a bunch of little kids.

SPEAKER_01: I'll bet they can see this over at Castle

Egremont.

SPEAKER_02: 10, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21.

SPEAKER_01: 21.

Save for half.

Might take an ogre out if they don't save.

SPEAKER_00: Is that 21 of the 100?

Ogre 1 does not save.

Uh yeah.

Ogre 2 does not save.

Gross of the important does save.

SPEAKER_01: Looks like you'll get your chance, Reyes.

SPEAKER_02: So it's 11.

Still takes like 11 or something.

SPEAKER_00: Yeah, 11.

Yeah.

The doors are blown outward.

All of the stuff that they had that they had were piling up.

All of the stuff that you guys piled up on the other side.

And the sort of force of the blast sucks all of the you hear

feel the onrush of air as it rushes past you to fill the

vacuum that is left when the fire burns.

Sorry, I think that's a good idea.

SPEAKER_01: I just had a picture of the four of us standing up

there on the steps of the matter as the flames, like in a movie

shot.

Our characters silhouetted by the flames.

I'm all giant, and you guys are hiding like behind me.

SPEAKER_00: The blast makes a clear spot.

So, Merrick, you are you hear all of this.

You hear a massive blast from inside.

You don't know why.

They did it.

So down the way, there's you know the ogres and the and the

blue ogre stop.

And behind you, the the old their attention.

Okay.

SPEAKER_01: What are you doing?

SPEAKER_02: Going back down the hill.

unknown: Backstab.

SPEAKER_01: Somebody should probably make sure the mounts

are still there.

I don't know.

At the bottom of the mountain.

SPEAKER_02: You gotta bring it to us as we're leaving, running

out, the extraction team.

All they need is their nightly grooming.

Horses need oats, right?

SPEAKER_01: They're thirsty.

Look, we're not there to help them make that decision.

They couldn't survive that.

He has no idea what the hell just happened.

Well, he has that.

He does have to make that decision.

I'm pretty sure he knows what happened.

The sky lits open to the sky.

It lit up the whole building.

SPEAKER_03: There's only like a small group of things that would

cause that.

SPEAKER_01: One, there's one thing.

Dragon breath would cause that.

Well, yeah, he's been talking about dragons all night long.

That's because he just can't stop himself and focus on the

actual things that are happening.

I know this.

I'm going to circle back towards the manor house in a route that

will take me there faster than following the road.

Okay.

Trying not to be seen by the blue ogre.

SPEAKER_00: All right.

SPEAKER_01: That should be pretty easy for you.

SPEAKER_00: We'll do that, and we'll do the rest of the things

on the next episode of Retro Roll.