Get Off My Lawn
National Grouch Day exists, it lands on October 15, and we are absolutely claiming it. We take our favorite kind of nostalgia, the kind with sharp edges, and use it to build a Gen X hall of fame for legendary grouches. Think Oscar the Grouch energy, but expanded into sitcom dads, cartoon villains, and the characters who taught us that complaining can be a craft.
We dig into where National Grouch Day came from (a sixth-grade prank aimed at a grouchy teacher) and then roll through the icons: Fred Sanford’s glorious crankiness, Archie Bunker as a complicated cultural time capsule, Al Bundy’s working-class doom humor, and Sophia Petrillo’s wisecracking truth bombs. We also get weirdly invested in Gargamel vs. the Smurfs, because if you rewatch as an adult, you might start asking uncomfortable questions about tiny blue creatures infesting your life.
Then Nicole pulls out a real diary-era story: defending herself on the school bus, getting punished anyway, and why that kind of unfair rule enforcement sticks with you. We round it out with Mr. T’s rise from real-life respect politics to Rocky III and The A-Team fame, plus bonus grouches like Garfield and the unbeatable Statler and Waldorf.
Hit play, laugh with us, and then tell us your take: are the Smurfs harmless, or are they the problem? Subscribe, share with your grouchiest friend, and leave a review so more Gen X nostalgia lovers can find us.
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1 SPEAKER_01: Two best friends talking fast.
We're missing to our case.
We're having a blast.
Seeing these dreams, clicking on screens.
It was all bad.
Like you know, like whatever.
Never never never.
We'll take you back like whatever.
SPEAKER_05: Welcome to Like Whatever, a podcast for, by, and
about you next.
I'm Nicole, and this is my BFFF, Heather.
Hello.
So I have to start by because you you probably already know
this, but it's the hundredth anniversary of Winnie the Pooh.
SPEAKER_06: I did know that.
Because he's on the cover of Time.
Or one of them.
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
Yeah, it's coming up uh October 14th.
It turns 100.
But his birthday is actually uh wait.
Uh yeah, 1921.
He was born in April of 1921.
But his A Milne?
Or Winnie the Pooh.
It says Winnie the Pooh.
But the anniversary of him, so I guess maybe it's the birth date
in like his bio.
SPEAKER_06: Maybe.
SPEAKER_05: There was five years old when there was a bear.
SPEAKER_06: Oh.
There is an actual bear.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So maybe it's the bear's birthday.
Maybe.
I don't remember.
Okay.
That's irrelevant.
Have you ever seen the thing where it they um have taken it
down to those are all um psychological issues?
Yes.
And I agree with all of them.
You want to guess which one I am.
Nobody cares.
SPEAKER_05: I use him as an example of personality for
people all the time.
SPEAKER_06: I am the living embodiment of Eeyore.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
But when I meet someone that's like that, I'll tell someone,
I'll be like, they're they're like Eeyore.
SPEAKER_06: Like it's literally a cloud that hangs over me all
the time.
Yes.
And rains right directly on me.
No joke.
And nobody cares.
Nobody cares.
No.
unknown: Nope.
SPEAKER_06: Uh so what'd you I didn't do anything cool.
I did want to complain for just one second, though.
Okay.
Because so weird thing is the day after Columbus Day, which is
next week.
Correct.
Is the busiest day in the post office for whatever reason.
It's the stupidest, it's not like the day after Columbus Day
off.
Really?
Oh, that's which I'm fine with because it's not real.
It's not a real holiday, but it is a federal holiday.
SPEAKER_05: It is, I know.
I will say I do miss having the day off.
SPEAKER_06: I'll accept it.
Yes.
Um it's weird because it's in the middle of October.
It's not like the day after Thanksgiving or anything, but it
is.
I swear to God, it is Christmas is coming early this year
because the last two days have been brutal.
Yesterday was an abomination.
I said I I don't know what next week's gonna be like when today
was like this.
This is gonna be awful.
Well, everybody's shopping early because everybody's broke.
I guess.
Well, it's it's because the Christmas catalogs start rolling
out, so like it's the my it's not packages so much that are
the problem, but it's the mail volume and it's those stupid ass
catalogs that that somehows get like 15 of them on one day.
I don't even know how they still make those things hot.
Somebody must be ordering from them because I had a ton of them
today and I had a ton yesterday.
Almost literally a ton.
It was a lot.
Ugh.
So I just want to bitch about that.
Yeah that apparently Christmas is a coming a week early.
I was out till normally I am done on a Monday 2.30 somewhere
in that neighborhood.
On a Tuesday depends on if we get the grocery flyers, which we
also had today.
Like one between 1.30 and 3 generally.
Pretty much any day of the week is usually between 1.30 and 3.
3 is late.
I didn't get back till 4 o'clock yesterday.
And 3 30 today.
I know.
Gross.
That's almost dark.
It's gonna be dark.
unknown: I know.
SPEAKER_05: Uh driving over from here in the dark.
Yeah.
It's a struggle.
unknown: I know.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
We should figure out how to meet in Lewis somewhere.
SPEAKER_05: I don't think that would be possible.
I mean the library, but I don't think it's quiet enough for us
to do all this.
SPEAKER_06: They have the special rooms.
They have special rooms, but the library's not open until uh past
4 30, I don't think.
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
SPEAKER_06: I have actually no idea what time the library
closes.
SPEAKER_05: You're just talking about your age.
SPEAKER_06: I imagine it would be open after school, but then
I'm thinking it's a state-run entity.
I don't know.
I have no idea.
Libraries could be open 24-7.
I don't know.
And then one other thing.
Gypsy Rose Blanchard.
Yo.
SPEAKER_05: What?
Yo, as soon as all I saw was the headline.
SPEAKER_06: I was like, that bitch did it again.
I sent it in as soon as it came up, I sent it to my sister, and
my sister just sent back uh oh.
SPEAKER_05: I mean, that is a horrible coincidence for her.
SPEAKER_06: I mean, she didn't, but come on, come on.
I'm pretty sure it was a drug overdose too.
He was only what in his 30s.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Anyway.
SPEAKER_05: I started watching the new season of American
Horror Story.
And how is it?
I actually am really enjoying it.
It's about Satan.
I love Satan.
I think you would enjoy it.
I might watch it.
It's got all the old everybody in it, all the actors and
characters.
And it's 13 episodes, and each episode, because it's 13 seasons
now, there's something relevant in each uh episode behind from
the past.
They make a lot of Taylor Swift little puns, which is number 13.
There was some other.
Oh, they should I probably shouldn't give it away, but they
do a Stefan um little pun from SNL.
I'll have to watch it.
Yeah, it's it's I've really been enjoying it.
There are only six episodes out so far because it's stupid HBO
or whatever that has to release one a week.
SPEAKER_06: Oh, they do that now again.
What happened I didn't like that back in the day.
No, I don't like it now.
No, you can't, I can't remember from week to week what happened.
Well, you can't release a whole season of shows for years.
Right.
Like, okay, so when we were kids, you had to watch it every
week.
Then you would go this whole summer without it, and then you
could watch reruns and hopefully But that was all we knew.
Exactly.
And then you gave us a whole season at a time and then you
stripped us of it.
SPEAKER_05: So you can't just take it back.
And now Netflix is like the only one that does that, and they
just have shit programming now.
I know.
Like Netflix hasn't had anything good on it in a long time, and
it's my most expensive prescription subscription.
But I'm like, I don't want to drop Netflix.
I know.
But they literally don't put anything good on it.
SPEAKER_06: No, I don't know how I'm gonna watch the Eagles game
because I don't have the NFL network.
Yeah.
Mom was like, oh, just come over here.
I was like, at nine in the morning.
I don't know.
But she will make me breakfast, so true.
Why can't you bring the bird?
Complicated stuff.
Why can't you bring the bird?
She's scared of birds.
She had a bird.
And she hated it.
Okay, we've talked about this before.
She didn't have the bird.
My dad had a bird.
unknown: Okay.
SPEAKER_06: But that was the two things I wanted to bitch about.
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
SPEAKER_06: I'm done now.
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
All right.
Good.
So before I get started, like share a rate review.
Find us where you listen to podcasts.
SPEAKER_05: Yes.
Follow us on all the socials.
Every single one of them.
All of them.
SPEAKER_06: Every one.
SPEAKER_05: At like whatever pod.
Uh you can visit our website at likewhateverpod.com.
Yes.
And we have merch there and all the episodes.
And you can send an email to likewhateverpod at gmail.com.
SPEAKER_06: Indeed.
SPEAKER_05: So Heather doesn't even know.
I don't know.
I love doing that too once in a while.
All right.
So I was looking.
Um again, I love to like look at this month in history, this day
in history, Gen X events, things that happen in the 80s.
I just kind of scroll around and look for something good.
So I found out that October 15th, which is next week, but
next week's your week, is um National Grouch Day.
And it's my week.
So let's fuck around and find out about National Grouch Day
and some Grouches Gen X grew up with.
SPEAKER_06: Is Oscar gonna be one of them?
Because he's like my favorite.
Of course.
Love me some Oscar.
It starts with him.
He just lives in a trash can and he's cool with it.
Yeah.
That's all he wants.
Yeah.
I don't blame him.
That's all I want too.
Just leave me alone in my trash pile.
SPEAKER_05: So my references were daysofhear.com and a lot of
wiki in here because wiki is good when you just want basic
information about things.
And that worked out for me.
So I I have to stop making excuses for using wiki.
I just feel bad when I do it.
Okay.
But I guess if I disclose it, it's all good.
All right.
Beginning.
SPEAKER_06: We never said we were going to be truthful here.
SPEAKER_05: We did not.
We actually tell you.
We're not.
Don't repeat it unless you look it up.
We just tell nothing but lies.
Well, that's not all true.
Um, all right.
Beginning in 1969, Oscar the Grouch joined the cast of Sesame
Street uh in delighting American children through the children's
television network and the public broadcasting service.
He's my favorite Grouch.
SPEAKER_06: Maybe.
I don't know.
SPEAKER_05: See, there's some good ones.
Um always acting a bit grumpy and complaining a lot, Oscar's
name reveals his character.
The origins of National Grouch Day are not specifically
connected to Oscar the Grouch or Sesame Street, however.
In fact, the day seems to have been created in 1976 when Bill
and Helen Chase of Chase's calendar of events were inspired
by their granddaughter Monica.
In sixth grade in Michigan at the time, Monica had particular
had a particularly grouchy teacher whose birthday was on
October 15th.
So as a practical joke, Monica and her friends dubbed this day
National Grouch Day.
SPEAKER_06: That's hilarious.
SPEAKER_05: As now National Grouch Day grew in popularity.
I love it.
I can't wait for the 15th.
I'm gonna celebrate myself.
That's uh my first wedding first marriage wedding anniversary.
Yes, it is.
So it's a good holiday for this.
It is all right.
So I just went through and I picked out some grouches, and
here we go.
Number one, Fred Sanford.
unknown: Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_05: Fred G.
Sanford is a fictional character from the 1972 to 1977 NBC
sitcom, Sanford and Sons.
Um Elizabeth, I'm coming.
I'm coming, Elizabeth.
Uh Sanford was betrayed, uh betrayed, portrayed by comedian
Red Fox.
Fred is an elderly, widowed, sarcastic, and cantankerous junk
and auntie dealer.
I think we're seeing a pattern.
Who runs Sanford and son from his home with his son Lamont.
Fred is known for a grouchy, irritable disposition and a need
to have things his way, delusions of grandeur and
occasional get rich quick, get rich quick schemes, uh, poor
cooking, bow-legged walking, and a self-diagnosed arthritis.
Disdain for his son Lamont, often calling him a big dummy.
Yeah.
I love that show.
I man, I if I catch it when I'm flipping through, I'll stop.
It's it's hilarious.
Fred moved with his wife Elizabeth and son Lamont to Los
Angeles, well, Los Angeles' Watts neighborhood in 1946.
After Elizabeth's sudden death, Fred raised Lamont alone.
Elizabeth, I'm coming for you.
Lamont dropped out of school to help run the junk business.
Red Fox appeared in all episodes except for nine in 1974 due to a
contract dispute.
The role earned Fox a Golden Globe and multiple Emmy
nominations.
TV Guide ranked Fred number 36 on its list of the 50 greatest
TV characters of all time.
SPEAKER_06: Yes, I agree.
Yeah.
And he's a good he's a good grouchy person.
It's acceptable.
Okay.
All right.
Next, Archie Bunker.
Does not live in a trash pile.
He does not.
But he is a grouch.
He is a grouch.
Man.
That episode where uh what's her name, dies?
Have you seen that episode?
I mean, probably.
Yeah, but like as a recent as an adult.
Yeah.
I don't know if I want to watch it.
Why can't I think of her name?
Edith.
Edith.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
Archibald Bunker is a fictional character from the 1970s
American television sitcom All in the Family.
Uh, Bunker is the main character of the series.
He's a World War II vet, uh, blue-collar worker and family
man.
All in the Family premiered on January 12th, 1971, where he was
depicted as the head of the Bunker family.
In 1979, the show was retold and renamed Archie Bunker's Place,
and it finally went off the air in 1983.
Bunker lived at the fictional address of 704 Hauser Street in
the Astoria neighborhood of Queens in New York City.
All in the family got many of its laughs by playing on
Archie's bigotry, although the dynamic tension between Archie
and his left-wing son-in-law Mike provided an ongoing
political and social sounding board for a variety of topics.
SPEAKER_06: Rest in peace, Rob Reiner.
Yes.
SPEAKER_05: Archie appears in all but seven episodes of the
series.
Three fifth season episodes were missed because of a contract
dispute.
Seems to be a theme between O'Connor and series creator
Norman Lear.
Archie was modeled after Norman Lear's father, Herman Lear, and
on Alf Garnett from the BBC sitcom till Death Do Us Part, on
which All in the Family was based.
It always starts in Britain.
I know.
SPEAKER_06: That's because they're funny motherfuckers.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, they they really are.
What is it?
Brit Box?
Man, I wish I could get that channel.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
SPEAKER_05: They have some good looking stuff on there.
Yeah.
But I'm not paying for another sub prescription subscription.
You know who I did talk today.
SPEAKER_06: It's okay.
You know who I don't think is funny?
Uh, Mr.
Bean.
No, I know.
Didn't he?
So they they failed.
Maybe they failed on that one.
Yeah, yeah.
Anyway.
SPEAKER_04: What was that show that we loved?
SPEAKER_06: Absolutely fabulous.
Yes.
Can't get enough of it.
Oh my god.
That was the best show ever.
I still, if I catch it on somewhere, I'll watch it.
SPEAKER_05: I never see it anywhere.
Um in 1999, TV Guide ranked Archie Bunker number five on its
50 Greatest TV Characters of All Time list.
In 2005, Archie Bunker was listed as number one on Bravo's
100 Greatest TV characters, defeating runners up like Ralph
Cramden, Lucy Ricardo, Fonzie, and Homer Simpson.
Archie's chair is in the permanent collection of the
National Museum of American History.
I have seen it.
I think I have too.
Archie has a gruff, unbearing demeanor, largely defined by his
bigotry towards a diverse group of individuals.
He refers to his son-in-law, Michael, as meathead and dumb
polock.
Archie himself is depicted as a striving, loving father, and
basically decent man.
Nevertheless, he is ill-tempered and frequently tells his
long-suffering wife, Edith, to stifle herself.
Series creator Norman Lear admitted this is how his father
treated his mother.
Archie turned the angry white male into a cultural icon,
according to CBS News.
After the end of the second season taping, O'Connor said,
paraphrasing James Baldwin, the American white man is trapped by
his own cultural history.
He doesn't know what to do about it.
Archie's dilemma is coping with a world that is changing in
front of him.
He doesn't know what to do except to lose his temper, mouth
his poisons, look elsewhere to fix the blame for his own
discomfort.
He isn't a totally evil man.
He's shrewd, but he won't get to the root of his problems because
the root of his problem is himself and he doesn't know it.
SPEAKER_06: Yep.
Yep.
Then he went on to be a police officer.
He did.
In whatever show that was.
I love Carol O'Connor.
Yeah.
I think it's a I think.
Yep.
SPEAKER_05: Yep.
All right.
My next one.
Al Bundy.
SPEAKER_06: Oh, another great one.
Not in a trash pile.
No.
Well, kind of.
They were white trash.
Yeah.
That's true.
Man, I love that show.
It does not hold up.
But I do love that show.
SPEAKER_05: It's so funny to go back and watch Christina
Applegate back then because she's become such like an icon
and sophisticated and standing up for you know at lots of
things and to see her play that part is just have you watched
Mount Modern Family?
SPEAKER_06: Oh yeah.
Okay.
So have I don't know.
Yeah.
I told you my theory is that out that Modern Family, Al and Peg
get divorced, and that he turns because I mean they always talk
about whatever her name, the daughter's past and how she was
the Kelly Bundy.
And then Bud, like you could see Bud could be gay.
SPEAKER_03: Yep, yep, yep.
I'm telling you.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_06: I think you're right.
And then when when Peg got divorced, she went and found a
biker and then moved to Sons of Anarchy and had one of the most
beautiful human beings ever put on this earth.
SPEAKER_05: I didn't even know you had a crush on him.
SPEAKER_06: Oh, he's hot.
He is hot.
Yeah.
unknown: Yeah.
SPEAKER_06: I mean, he's no Johnny Depp, but he's still hot.
I like the bad boys.
Yeah, yeah.
Always have.
So sad.
SPEAKER_05: All right.
Alphonse Bundy is a fictional character and the protagonist of
the American television series Married with Children, played by
Ed O'Neill.
He is a misanthropic working class father of two who is
portrayed as a tragic, tragicomedic figure.
I knew I was going to mess that word up.
I looked, I read it like 10 times last night.
I was like, I'm still going to mess it up.
I don't know.
SPEAKER_06: That happens.
SPEAKER_05: I could have gone in and changed the word for like a
synonym, but no, I chose to struggle through it.
Nope.
I said, no, I will conquer you.
I didn't.
Um, he laments his lot in life, but nevertheless stands by his
family, displaying wit, self-sacrifice, and resilience
in times of crisis.
He and his wife Peggy were rated the 59th best characters on
television by Bravo.
And in 2016 interview, O'Neill said that he based his
interpretation of Al Bundy on one of his uncles.
SPEAKER_06: Makes sense.
SPEAKER_05: Al Bundy was born on November 7th in Chicago,
Illinois.
Al's mother may have been an alcoholic.
As shown in flashback sequences, he recalls a moment when his
mother tells him that he can become anything, and then in
real time remarks, You're right, Mom.
Try saying that when you're sober.
He was a star fullback on the Polk High School football team
and was offered a scholarship to play college football.
However, a broken leg and his subsequent marriage to high
school sweetheart Peggy Wanker, while intoxicated, changed his
fortunes.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
SPEAKER_05: Al and Peggy lived in Chicago and have two
children: Kelly, played by Christina Applegate, a
promiscuous, dim-witted blonde, and Bud, played by David
Faustino, an intelligent but sex-obsessed and unpopular
schemer named after Budweiser Beer.
I don't think I knew that.
I didn't know that either.
Al works as a shoe salesman at the fictional Gary Shoes and
Accessories for today's women.
In the fictional New Market Mall.
Al has a sarcastic and cynical sense of humor, and he
frequently makes sardonic observations.
Politically, Al appears to have mixed views.
Various episodes depict him mocking Rush Limbaugh, whereas
others show him as a committed fan of conservative icon John
Wayne.
He is an ardent admirer of President Dwight D.
Eisenhower.
He continually battles with Marcy, a staunch feminist, and
even forms a misogynist group named No Mam.
unknown: I remember that.
SPEAKER_05: His views on economic issues display a
populist disdain for the wealthy, including leading a
violent protest against a proposed law that would tax beer
but not wine.
Oh, did you see today?
Um who died today?
Who died today?
It was the evangelist that was married to Tammy Faye.
Baker.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_04: Wow.
SPEAKER_06: Interesting.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
All right.
That's no loss.
It's just a gen X thing, though, that I thought of.
All right, next.
Sophia Petrillo.
Is one of the four main characters on the 1985 NBC
sitcom The Golden Girls.
SPEAKER_06: That's a good one.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
The brazen wisecracking mother of Dorothy Zornak.
Sophia moved in with her daughter and her roommates after
her retirement home burns down.
She became the unspoken matriarchal figure, bringing
tall tales, wisecracks, delicious recipes, and a touch
of motherly love to the Miami household.
She is the widow of the late Salvador Petrillo and the mother
of Dorothy Zorback.
Zornak?
Gloria Harker and the late Philip Petrillo.
So she has three kids.
Yes.
Um I'm a big fan of the Golden Girls.
That's another one I will definitely stop.
And there is a channel or two that will run them on street.
Yeah.
Oh, that show is hilarious.
Sophia appeared in all seven seasons of The Golden Girls.
SPEAKER_06: No disputes where she lost.
SPEAKER_05: No disputes.
Exactly.
SPEAKER_06: There wasn't a seven episode.
SPEAKER_05: Dispute break.
Uh during the series run, Sophia resembled the arch archetypic,
uh the typical old lady.
SPEAKER_06: We need to put Italian in there.
Oh.
SPEAKER_05: Because she was very much the typical white hair,
small structure, wrinkles, and large framed eyeglasses.
She was shown to have a fondness for conservative elderly
clothing, such as cardigans, knee-high stockings, and moo moo
dresses.
I wear knee high stockings, by the way.
And my admin, who is like 20 years younger than me, makes fun
of me.
One day I wore a dress and I had on black tights.
She's like, oh my God, are you wearing tights?
And she reached over and like pulled them.
And I'm like, Yeah.
She's like, You're so old school.
I'm like, what else am I gonna wear?
I have an undress and it's cold outside.
Supposed to wear tight.
Yeah, I don't do that knee boot thing that boots to the knee and
then a dress, and your legs are bare.
No, that's too cold for me.
SPEAKER_06: You know they have fleece leggings that are skin
toned with like it looks like pantyhose over them.
Yeah.
So it looks like you're bare-legged.
Well, it looks like you just have pantyhose on.
Okay.
But they're actually flesh-colored fleece-lined
leggings.
I'm gonna keep rocking my black tights.
Okay.
I'm just saying.
SPEAKER_05: Um Sophia owned a tan bamboo handbag that became
her personal trademark.
She carried that purse everywhere, out in public,
around the house, even in the bathroom.
SPEAKER_06: Look, I can attest because my mother does not put
that motherfucker down for nothing.
She takes that bitch everywhere.
We're in a restaurant, and she goes to the bathroom, she takes
it with her.
And I'm like, what are you doing in there with your purse?
Nothing.
She doesn't want you guys to steal it.
I don't know what she does, but we make fun of her.
SPEAKER_05: It's that generation, man.
Like the purse was so much.
SPEAKER_06: We weren't allowed in our parents' purses.
Trucks along to the and I'm like, where are you going with
your bar?
Leave your purse here.
I don't know if they think they have to beat somebody with it or
what.
SPEAKER_05: Maybe she's got her mace in there or something.
SPEAKER_06: Maybe.
Who knows what's in there?
SPEAKER_05: She probably doesn't even know what's in there.
I bet there's chocolate in there.
No, yeah.
In case your dad gets hung down.
Sophia is best known for her wisecracks put downs and brazen
remarks, often commenting on Dorothy's lack of love life,
Blanche's promiscuity, and Rose's stupidity.
However, despite her sharp cart uh criticism of her daughter and
housemates, she loves and cares for them deeply.
She even sees Rose and Blanche as surrogate daughters.
The other women usually seek Sophia out for advice, which
Sophia is all too willing to share, usually beginning with
her catchphrase, picture it.
Like Rose's stories, Sophia's parables often end with a moral
from which advice can be gleaned.
These stories usually also involved historical figures,
with Sophia claiming to have had trysts with Pablo Picasso,
Sigmund Freud, and Winston Churchill, amongst others.
She also claims to have befriended many famous people,
including Golden Murr, uh Mama Celeste, Mussolini, and claims
claimed in the episode Miles to Go that Robert Frost was always
nipping at her nose, confusing him with Jack Frost.
All right.
Are you ready for the next one?
I am.
Gargamel.
Oh we're taking an old school cartoon.
Yep.
Gargamel is a fictional character and the main
antagonist of the Smurfs.
Uh it was created by Belgian cartoonist Peyo.
Just one name.
That's all you need.
Yeah.
He is depicted as a reclusive sorcerer who, alongside his cat
Azriel, frequently attempts to capture the Smurfs for various
purposes.
Although the character was intended to be retired after his
first appearance, Peyo began incorporating Gargamel in future
stories, allowing him to endure as the archenemy, archenemy of
the Smurfs.
SPEAKER_06: What a wild concept the Smurfs are.
SPEAKER_05: Definitely LSD involved, right?
SPEAKER_06: I mean, well, number one, how they get more Smurfs,
because there's only one Smurfette.
Exactly.
So do they just like reproduce like gremlins?
Or do they get wet and then they have more?
SPEAKER_05: Or maybe they're like earthworms and you rip them
in half.
And they become two smurfs.
SPEAKER_06: Are they gnomes?
Is that what they're supposed to be?
SPEAKER_05: Do they have a secret sex cave where they go in
and make babies?
SPEAKER_06: They only have one smurfette.
And then they all call they all call the one Papa Smurfs.
So I don't know if maybe Papa Smurf and Smurfette made all
them all of them.
I don't know, but the Smurfs is a wild concept.
SPEAKER_05: Uh Gargomel is depicted as a perpetually
stooped man past his prime.
His dark robe is worn and patched.
He is balding and his teeth are rotten.
He lives in a shack with a feline companion, a brown cat
that does not speak but exhibits many anthropomorphic personality
traits.
I swear I can't read that.
I love that word.
SPEAKER_06: That's one of my favorite words.
SPEAKER_05: Did you like how I said it?
I loved it.
Gargamel has a deep and strong hate for Smurfs, although he is
not above pretending to befriend them when it serves his
interest.
SPEAKER_06: I mean, I don't know how you could not hate Smurfs.
I know.
It's creepy.
They're creepy little fuckers.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, I enjoy watching the Smurfs, but I'm just saying.
If you had to be with them in real life.
Yeah.
Like if I was to watch it now as an adult, as a 52-year-old
adult, which is probably how old Gargamel was.
I don't know.
Might see things a little different.
Because, you know, you watch these old shows, and you know,
I'm trying to think of the one I'm thinking about.
We'll use dirty dancing as, you know, as the and and as a kid,
you were like, Yeah, don't put baby in the corner.
And now you're like, what the fuck, baby?
Like, you went crazy there for like what were you thinking?
Yeah.
You were not using your head.
You were not.
Your parents raised you better than us.
What is you belong in the corner?
Exactly.
You should have, you should have been sent home.
That whole thing should have been ended and back home.
That's what should have happened.
So, like, now if I watch the Smurfs, what I'd be like, that
Smurfs like antagonize this shit out of poor garden milk.
Like, I'd be trying to kill them too.
Are they like ants?
And they like infest his house, and he's like, God damn it.
Smurfs everywhere.
Oh, the Smurfs terminator.
I'm gonna, I'm gonna have to re-watch the Smurfs now.
Like old school Smurfs.
Yes.
Just so I can find out.
Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_05: You should let us know.
I will.
All right.
Uh Gargomel has a deep and strong hate for Smurfs.
Oh, I already read that.
Um Gargamel always wishes harm on the Smurfs.
He wants to use their essence to create gold, to use them as a
key ingredient for a recipe, or to annihilate them entirely.
SPEAKER_06: I'm telling you, they must have done something.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
He's like, oh, I could turn them all fuckers into gold.
How much money I'd have and I wouldn't be having to live in
this shit hole.
Yeah.
Already get it.
No need to rewatch.
SPEAKER_05: I think it found the problem.
Gargamel is an invertebrate bungler.
Or a bumbler like me.
Some of his schemes to catch Smurfs border on the bazaar,
such as a blue magnet that attracted solely blue items.
Though he does have rare moments of genius.
The creation of Smurfette for one, which only failed because
she betrayed him and joined the Smurfs.
Oh, so she did not make.
I knew that when you said she and Papa Smurf made the baby
Smurfs.
I'm like, no, she wasn't.
She was later.
Um he has a seemingly, but how did he make a Smurfette?
SPEAKER_06: I don't know.
This whole, we're gonna have to revisit it.
SPEAKER_05: Did he get her DNA?
SPEAKER_06: And I I mean he cloned.
I guess.
No, because if she's the only girl, there's is there other
smurfs somewhere that we don't know about?
Maybe he had maybe their pets somewhere else and he had one
ship.
unknown: Um yeah.
SPEAKER_06: Or we bought one from Dude.
I do.
I gotta get down to the bottom of the Smurfs now.
I don't remember any of I mean I remember the Smurfs, but now I
don't remember.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, definitely not.
I thought I knew the Smurfs.
Right?
Apparently not.
He has a seemingly endless library of spellbooks, potions,
and gimmicks for his life's passion.
However, no matter how elaborate Gargamel's plan, they invariably
end in failure, causing him to spell his catchphrase, I hate
smurfs.
I'm gonna be saying that.
That's gonna be my catchphrase.
Sometimes he will also throw a temper tantrum, uh, howling in
grief.
One rhetorical question he asks himself is I am brave and
strong, and they are puny and weak.
And why can't I defeat those miserable, vile little smurfs?
SPEAKER_06: Fuckers.
You know what?
I really am starting to come on to the gargamel side.
Because you know what else is fucking annoying about the
smurfs?
Everything is smurf this and smurf that, and they're smurfing
over here.
SPEAKER_05: They're smurfastic.
Yeah, they're feeling smurfy.
Yeah.
Stop it.
SPEAKER_06: Stop.
SPEAKER_05: Don't do like the grouch.
SPEAKER_06: I do.
I'm very, I'm very this is good times.
Uh and now that I'm older, I get it.
SPEAKER_05: However, his defeats never discourage him, and he
always vows, I'll get you if it's the last thing I do.
SPEAKER_06: See, we could make a grown-up version of the Smurfs
now for Gen X, and he could just be like, You fuckers gotta go.
SPEAKER_05: It could be all violent shit.
Yeah.
Oh, I didn't put enough grouches on here because I only have one
more.
SPEAKER_06: But you might want to do your.
SPEAKER_05: Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_00: Because I repeat your life, we're lucky through
her teenage bike.
SPEAKER_05: All right, uh this week in Nicole's diary.
Um, we are at December 23rd.
Oh, 1987.
Christmas Eve Eve.
Yeah, and this is related to it.
I got through off the bus.
I did say through for spraying some hairspray in some boys'
eyes.
You had a real issue.
I did.
And mommy thinks she is punishing me by not letting me
go to school tomorrow just because I'll miss a Spanish
fiesta.
Suits me fine.
I get Christmas break vacation off a day early.
Like that.
I've always seen the silver lining.
So I I remember this.
SPEAKER_06: Um don't threaten me with a good time.
SPEAKER_05: It was actually one of the kids who was a big name
in the town I grew up in and that carried a lot of weight
where we were.
I get it.
And we were on the school bus, and he kept putting his hands
where they shouldn't go on me, and I got sick of it, and he
wouldn't stop grabbing me.
So I grabbed the big old can of um Aquanette.
Aquanette out of my bag, and I sprayed him in the eyes.
And then I got suspended off the bus and he did not.
SPEAKER_06: Well, it's funny because my sister punched a kid
in the face because he was making fun of her little buddy,
her little friend.
He was bullying, and she punched him in the face, and he was also
a very, very big name in Ocean City.
Uh-huh.
But because he was embarrassed, she broke his nose.
Wow.
Yeah.
But because he was embarrassed that it was a girl, he didn't
tell anybody who it was because when my sister got home, the bus
driver loved my sister and I because he was black.
He was black and we did not have a problem with that.
Right.
Unlike everybody else that went to my school.
Right.
I shouldn't say that.
Not everybody had that.
Whatever, you get it.
A lot of them.
Um so he didn't say anything either, probably because this
kid was a jackass.
And when my sister got home from school and said I punched him in
the face, my mom was like, of all the kids to punch in the
face.
Had to be that one.
Had to be that one.
And but he was embarrassed it was a girl, so he didn't tell
anybody, and then he started coming to school in a limo.
Champagne problems.
SPEAKER_05: No more bus rides for him because he gets beat up
by girls.
So I have my um suspension slip.
I can't believe you have that.
It's the yellow carbon copy, like when it was three different
sheets.
Um, so Milford Middle School.
Um principal Gary Annette is the one that signed it.
Um your child, Nicole Egler, has been suspended.
And then it says bus only.
Well, look, all right.
First it says your child, fill in the blank, Nicole Egler.
Has been the options are suspended slash paddled.
So suspended is circled.
It says bus only.
See, people, it was real.
Uh, from Milford Middle School for the following reason
spraying hairspray into a student's eyes.
The length of the suspension is a maximum of one day, affected
122386.
Um, a conference is requested to determine methods to correct the
correct the behavior.
Under no conditions should your child be in the vicinity of the
middle school during a period of suspension, as this may lead to
further disciplinary action.
SPEAKER_06: That's hilarious.
SPEAKER_05: It's really harsh for a middle schooler.
SPEAKER_06: You rabble rouser.
SPEAKER_05: The funny thing is, I was a really good kid because
I was so scared of getting in trouble.
But yeah, that one I mean, justice comes to justice.
SPEAKER_06: Like you gotta do what you gotta do.
SPEAKER_05: Exactly.
Maybe he got hit by a mac chuck when he grew up or something.
SPEAKER_06: Or he's in jail for assault.
Rapist or raping.
SPEAKER_05: Maybe he went to um Cornell.
SPEAKER_06: Maybe he had a kid that went to Cornell.
SPEAKER_05: Probably.
SPEAKER_06: That just infuriates me so much.
SPEAKER_05: Okay.
SPEAKER_06: I was gonna say something else, but I don't
remember what it was now about you being a badass.
SPEAKER_05: Damn, I'm sorry you forgot.
I'm not a badass very often.
I don't remember.
All right.
Here's our final grouch.
The final grouch.
SPEAKER_06: Mr.
T.
unknown: Oh.
SPEAKER_06: I just watched, he's got a documentary or something
on.
SPEAKER_03: Does he?
Oh, I think I did see that.
Did you you watched it?
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
SPEAKER_03: Is it good?
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
Okay.
Because remember, I said I then I started looking for if you can
download the GPS.
You can't.
It's very disappointing.
It was only for the um Garmin.
No, it wasn't Garmin.
Whatever the other company was.
I didn't have the Garmin one.
I had the lesser comp, but it was only done for that, and they
don't even have it online.
I know.
SPEAKER_05: That's a damn shame.
We just have to live in our memories for that.
SPEAKER_06: I'll tell you, I would still use it.
That was fucking hilarious.
SPEAKER_05: It was by far the best one I've ever heard.
SPEAKER_06: Really was.
SPEAKER_05: All right.
Um Lawrence Tarot.
Is that how you say his last name?
It's for it looks like it's French.
SPEAKER_06: I don't remember.
SPEAKER_05: It looks like Trudeau, but it's T-U-R-E-A-U-D.
SPEAKER_06: Trua True, I guess.
Okay.
We're just gonna con Mr.
T.
Mr.
T.
Yep.
SPEAKER_05: Uh he was born May 21st, 1952.
Um, he's an American actor and retired professional wrestler.
He is known for his roles as B.A.
Barackas in the 1980s television series The A-Team and as boxer
Klubber Lang in the 1982 film Rocky III.
That's where he got his start.
SPEAKER_06: It was crazy because he was supposed to wrestle or
something, and they fired him because he would he went to do
the movie and he was supposed to come.
SPEAKER_05: So he had to I think there's somewhere down in here
too.
I think not about that, but I think there's more about the
Rocky thing later.
I don't know.
I read a lot and I cut a lot.
Apparently, I cut too much.
Um he's also known for his distinctive hairstyle inspired
by Mandinka Warriors in West Africa, his copious gold
jewelry, his tough guy persona, and his catchphrase, I pity the
fool.
First uttered as Clubber Lang in Rocky III, then turned into a
trademark used in slogans or titles.
In 1980, Mr.
T was spotted by Sylvester Stallone, here we go, while
taking part in NBC's uh America's Toughest Bouncer
competition.
SPEAKER_02: That's right.
SPEAKER_05: I didn't know they had reality TV shows like that
back then.
Yeah.
Uh a segment of NBC's games people play.
Although his role in Rocky III was originally intended as just
a few lines, Mr.
T was eventually cast as Club or Lang and the primary antagonist.
His catchphrase, a pity fool, comes from the film.
When asked if he hates Rocky, Lang replies, No, I don't hate
Balboa, but a pity fool.
SPEAKER_06: The documentary does go into the whole and and they
talk to Sylvester Stallone too.
And it's well, mostly because I love Rocky.
So yeah.
It's a good, it's a good document.
I don't remember what it was called.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I'm gonna look it up.
I I feel like I remember seeing it somewhere now, but yeah.
I need to watch the Jay-Z documentary.
SPEAKER_06: He's very complimentary of Sylvester
Stallone.
I think that's who gave him his I bet.
Because I think they didn't want him, and Sylvester Stallone was
like, we totally gotta go with that guy.
SPEAKER_05: See, I thought that was I must have read that and
cut it out of here because I remember seeing that.
SPEAKER_06: That like he Sylvester Stallone really pushed
for Mr.
TW.
SPEAKER_05: He pushed for everything.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_06: I can't wait for that movie to come out next
month.
Yes.
SPEAKER_05: I know.
In the A-Team, he played Sergeant Bosco B.A.
Barackis, an ex army commando, on the run with three other
members of the United States government for a crime they
didn't commit.
As well as the team's tough guy, B.A.
was a mechanical genius, but afraid of flying.
When asked at a press conference whether he was as stupid as B.A.
Barackus, Mr.
T observed quietly, it takes a smart guy to play dumb.
SPEAKER_06: This is true.
SPEAKER_05: So they used to poison his milk, right?
Or I don't drug his milk.
I don't remember.
You didn't watch the oh man, we were avid.
I think they always gave him a glass of milk and they had put a
sleep aid in it, and then he'd drink the milk and he'd fall
asleep and they'd put him in whatever they had to fly in, and
then they'd get him to where they'd be like, but like every
time he fell for it.
SPEAKER_06: I gotta see what was on at the same time as it,
because I feel like whatever I was The A-Team was a really good
show.
SPEAKER_05: Um the series was a major hit, and B.A.
Barackis in particular quickly became a cult character and the
de facto star of the show.
Reportedly sparking tensions with seasoned actor George
Pipard, although Mr.
T always maintained that these were unfounded rumors.
Mr.
T was reported to be earning $80,000 a week for his role on
the A team.
That was a lot of money back then.
$80,000 a week?
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
unknown: It's a lot.
SPEAKER_06: It is.
Did you find out what's uh It was on a Tuesday, it was on
Tuesday at 8.
And it doesn't say there was anything really that was up
against it, but Tuesday nights there was one show, but it
didn't come on until 10.
9 or 10.
And I did not miss it.
And that was moonlighting.
SPEAKER_05: Oh.
SPEAKER_06: I wasn't allowed to watch moonlighting.
I did not miss it.
There was no missing moonlighting.
Maybe you were napping at eight, so you'd be able to stay up and
watch moonlighting.
Because that was like the one I did not miss moonlighting.
Yeah, I wish I would have watched that, but I wasn't
allowed to watch it.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, well, I'm sure.
Mr.
T was born in Chicago, Illinois, the youngest son of a family
with 12 children.
He and his four sisters and seven brothers grew up in a
three-room apartment in the Robert Taylor Homes public
housing.
His father, Nathaniel T, was a minister.
After his father left, when Lawrence was five years old, he
shortened his name to Lawrence Tarot.
In 1970, he legally changed his name to T.
His new name, Mr.
T, was based upon his childhood impressions regarding the lack
of respect from white people for his family.
T recalls, I think about my father being called boy, my
uncle being called boy, my brother coming back from Vietnam
and being called boy.
So I questioned myself, what does a black man have to do
before he's given respect as a man?
So when I was 18 years old, when I was old enough to fight and
die for my country, old enough to drink, old enough to vote, I
said I was old enough to be called a man.
I self-ordained myself Mr.
T.
So the first word out of everybody's mouth is Mr.
Gone.
I love it.
Drop the mic.
So that's all my grouches.
I love it.
unknown: I love it.
SPEAKER_05: And I'm mad that I could have, I would have had
time for more.
I felt like it was a lot.
But I got one out of the top of my head.
Yeah, go for it.
Garfield.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
He was quite grouchy.
Very grouchy.
Just upset.
SPEAKER_04: Because he was always hungry.
He just wanted those ones.
SPEAKER_06: But why did he have to torture the dog?
Odie was annoying.
Okay, but Odie was a dog.
SPEAKER_05: An annoying dog.
Okay.
But you got a cat person and a dog person.
Yeah.
Disputing this.
We're never gonna come to a conclusion.
We're never.
SPEAKER_06: We're never gonna know.
I'm I can't see Garfield's side on that one.
I mean, I like lasagna, but yeah.
SPEAKER_05: What were some of the other ones that I saw?
Dang it.
My brain's fried today.
SPEAKER_06: I know.
I'm trying to think of one out.
Oh and then one two more, technically.
Statler and Waldorf from The Muppet.
First of all, I love The Muppets.
Very much so, yeah.
Um the first movie I ever saw was the Muppet movie in
theaters.
And my dad took me.
SPEAKER_05: And those movies are so good.
SPEAKER_06: Yes.
My dad is particularly fond of animal.
SPEAKER_05: That makes sense.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
And we I got him for Christmas a couple years ago.
It is a thing that goes over your helmet that is animal.
But he couldn't wear it because it was impeding his eyes or
something.
I don't know.
But those two were fucking fantastic.
SPEAKER_05: They like made the show.
It was great.
SPEAKER_06: They did a revamp and they they ran a Muppet show
like this with Sabrina Carpenter.
I saw it.
I didn't like it.
I didn't either.
Didn't made me sad.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_05: Don't tell me you're giving me the Muppets and then
half the show is Sabrina Carpenter.
And it was only like half an hour long.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_06: And it wasn't very Muppety.
What the hell was that?
Yeah.
Where where was Gonzo and the chicken?
Yeah, like I don't know.
I don't know.
That made me grumpy.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
Yeah.
I I just uh the mup, what a great concept the Muppets were.
Yes.
Jim Henson is a genius.
I mean for real.
Like those.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_05: Yep.
But we did grow up with a lot of grouchy characters.
We did.
We really did.
Because we are grouchy.
Yeah.
Maybe that's why.
Maybe that's why it's what we were exposed to.
SPEAKER_06: Like, well, that's what you're supposed to be.
I'm telling you, I think as an adult, you go back and watch all
these and you'd be like, mm, it makes sense.
Yeah.
Maybe not Archie Bunker.
No.
SPEAKER_05: No, there was there was quite a bit I had to cut out
of that one because I didn't want to make it about that.
But as I was reading it, I was like, Yeah.
That's pretty bad.
But but he's the number one TV character of all time.
Well apparently.
SPEAKER_06: Well, because I think it was like a I mean, Rob
Reiner did the show, so it's not like it was like I think it was
just intended to show that's outgoing.
Like that's not who we know.
And and I I think when he changed to Archie Bunker's
place, he was nicer.
Because I remember there being like a little kid.
A little girl, maybe.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_05: Maybe Meathead had a kid.
SPEAKER_06: No, I don't think so.
I think she was just some rando.
unknown: Okay.
SPEAKER_06: Like Punky Brewster.
SPEAKER_05: Maybe like a neighbor or something.
A kid that came over him or something.
SPEAKER_06: I I don't remember now, but yeah.
Punk what another wild concept.
Punky Brewster.
Orphans everywhere.
Do they even have orphanages anymore?
Yes.
Do they?
Yes.
Where are they?
Can you just go to one and pick out a kid?
Uh or are they called something else?
SPEAKER_05: Like.
No, I mean, I I I can't speak for sure in America.
Because I think they just go in the foster system.
I was gonna say, but around the world, like you'll still hear of
like uh missionaries going and building orphanages and stuff
for when entire villages get wiped out and little kids are
left with literally no one.
SPEAKER_06: That's crazy.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
Yeah.
SPEAKER_06: It's a hard knock life for us.
Well, thank you for being grouchy.
SPEAKER_05: You're welcome.
SPEAKER_06: Coming down to my level.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I couldn't let National Grouch Day coming back.
SPEAKER_06: I'm on the grouch.
Yeah.
Now I gotta go back and watch some Smurfs.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
I'm excited for you to watch Smurfs.
And I'm excited for me to watch the Mr.
T documentary.
SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
Looks like we have we are very busy.
Yes, we have homework.
Anyway, thanks for listening.
Thank you.
Um, you can like, share, rate, review.
Please, please, please.
You can find us on all the socials.
Like whatever pod.
You can uh go to our website, likewhateverpod.com.
You can find us.
Uh-huh.
You can find us where all the podcasts live.
Yep.
You can send us an email about how stupid the smurfs were.
And what your idea, like, what do you think they were?
Were they like ants or rats or what?
Maybe you know.
Maybe they're aliens.
The truth is out there.
Two like whatever pod at gmail.com or don't like
whatever.
SPEAKER_04: Whatever.
SPEAKER_06: Bye.
SPEAKER_01: You back like whatever.